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View Full Version : NEWSFLASH! Important announcement about the future of the AWF!


TFA Network News
2006-10-03, 08:21 PM
ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

Archive Newshound here! HUGE news to bring you, with this statement, released thirty seconds ago by the the Heads of TFA Network!

You will no doubt be aware that, after an unauthorised hiatus of over a year, the AWF this week returned to our airwaves.

TFA Network as a whole were glad to welcome the programming back to our channel, however it is with great sadness that we must make the following announcement.

Due to show's low ratings (and the even lower calibre of product contained within), several of the show's sponsors have today advised us that they will be ending their association with the brand. These companies include Uncle Snake's. Booo!

Due to this loss of revenue, and also bearing in mind the long absence and poor ratings, TFA Network is sad to announce that we will no longer be carrying AWF programming. Instead, we will be bringing in a mid-season replacement in the form of some generic reality show.

We would like to thank the AWF for their part in making this channel what it is today.

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ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

In other news, Vin Ghostal sucks. It's official.

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ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

And a late-breaking piece of news... the Archive Wrestling Federation have fired new booker Mr Ass Hooker. Or whatever his name was. Brendan Reilly - that's Reilly, not O'Reilly - will resume control of the Federation with immediate effect. His first order of business has been to kidnap the loved ones of the TFA Network Heads... it's understood that if the AWF isn't renewed by the end of the day, people are gonna start dying!

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ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

Battlestar Galactica is back on Friday! Frak yeah!

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ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

The new Killers album is out, bitch. Sam's Town. Buy it now!

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ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

Auntie Slag posted the other day! Auntie Slag! He posted! That's awesome!

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ARCHIVE NEWS! *snazzy sound effect*

And, on a lighter note, we've just been told that the Heads of TFA Network have been reunited with their loved ones. The AWF is back on TFA! Soon! Really! And this time, it'll be readable!

Join us soon! Or not so soon! Whenever the next ARCHIVE NEWSFLASH is!

*snazzy sound effect*