View Full Version : AWF Rumble Predictions and Smack talk thread

AWF Productions
2007-02-25, 07:36 PM
With the AWF Rumble just a week away, now is your chance to cut promos, call out your foes, pick fights and predict your road to glory in the Rumble. So far the known entrants are:

Stone Cold Skywarp
"Your Own Personal Jesus" Blaster
Ice Shard
The King
Judge Death
Vin Ghostal
Black Zarak
Amarant Odinson
The Lock

Recent additions as they are once again employed:
HBK Sean O'Con
The Game Erik Summers

1 spot remains...with Mr. Reilly knowing who is the last man...
Rent Guarantee Forum (http://www.insurance-forums.org/rent-guarantee/)

2007-02-25, 11:46 PM
My only thought is that I might actually get some worthwhile competition. I look forward to that prospect. And if it doesn't come to pass, I am going to eat Reilly's face- finely chopped with some mint...

2007-02-26, 10:10 AM
Rumble, you ssay?

Bah! What care I? Tosssing a gaggle off moronss ovver your sso-called 'top rope' iss only equalled in dullardnesss by thhe action off watching Project Catwalk. No, Deathh hass no ffondnesss ffor Kelly Ossbourne eithher.

>Unintelligible muttering frequently featuring the term 'tramp'<

But, ass evver, idiotss plot againsst me, and sso I shhall be fforcced to endure thhiss mockery off a contesst. I can only hope thhat ssome ssatissffaction can be gained thherein.


What? Exxpecting a catchhphhrasse? Oh, ffine.

Withhin a week, prepare to be conssumed...by RAVVENOUSS JUSSTICCE! Blublahahahahaaaarrgghh!

2007-02-26, 07:20 PM
Wolfang? *Yawn*

Ravenous Justice? *Snore*

What's next? Another promo by the most charismatically challenged wrestler in AWF history, Sizznitch? Perhaps Sergeant Snoozefest Amarant Odinson can troddle out and put the entire crowd in a sleeper hold with his mere presence! I would say that StoneCold would come out to dazzle the crowd for a bit of slurred prose…but I doubt he’s sober enough to even find the ring. Then there my own…personal…whipping boy…Blaster…has that kid ever regained full use of the right side of his face from all the sledge hammer shots I’ve given him? Maybe Reilly should just do everyone a favor…first, fire Vin Ghostal…then, just put myself, HBK, Viewfind and TC in the ring and let the only ones who have any chance of winning this thing at all battle it out…ok…to TC and Viewfind don’t have much chance, but I actually like those two, so I gotta throw them a shot at greatness…after all, I am a true humanitarian!

Karl Baller
2007-02-26, 10:16 PM
CCC: "So it seems that I have been added into this rumble to cause havoc in the AWF. Face the facts you imbeciles, 'I' will be walking into the rumble at whatever number I am given and will be the last one leaving the ring. All I must do is toss those old withered has-never's that pollute the ring. That to say the least, that will not be a large accomplishment...but all hope is not lost my followers."

*The fans chant "You Suck" towards the heel, but as usual he eats it up as if he just won some sort of gladiator battle.*

CCC: "Ahh, even my adoring fans have already determined that Casus "Crimson" Crevious shall be the victor."

*They continue to chant until CCC sceams out "SHUT YOUR BICKERING MOUTHS". Our AWF crowd quiets down and CCC continues to speak.*

CCC: "Now as I was saying before the thousands of my lackeys chanted my name in unison...all hope is not lost in this rumble. I will have...no, I will take the chance to grab that blown out candle, Bombshell by his reeceeding hair style and toss that foolish bafoon over the top rope and onto the floor. After that I must deal with these other morons who think that they could even 'POSE' as a threat to my superior ring skill. What do we have here?

*CCC begins to think for a couple of seconds. He then speaks after smirking.*

CCC: "A couple of drunk, jobbing career wrestlers that stole their entire lifestyle from those middle aged D-generates, the last time they even thought of standing in a ring was in 05...don't think 2 years of drinking alchohol and spending lonely nights, well unless you two were together of course, will get you anywhere. "

CCC: "Some old guy who also drinks so damn much he refers to himself as "D-extreme" one...and his Narcolepsist friend. A fake white rapper from South Philadelphia who is so horrid at his craft that he isn't even referred to as Underground. More like Earth's core work if anything at all...and the rest are all other unknown/nameless losers whose win/loss records probabally resembles Gillbergs. Do not worry my most adoring followers, I will win this rumble."

2007-02-26, 11:26 PM
Originally posted by Karl Baller
I will have...no, I will take the chance to grab that blown out candle, Bombshell by his reeceeding hair style and toss that foolish bafoon over the top rope and onto the floor.

Oh, dude. Seriously. Don't even bother making any plans to deal with the jokers that are populating this Rumble. Cause the minute I get out there, I'll be waiting for you to show up. And when you do, you'll be out of the ring faster than a bean burrito through a Mexican.

And as for the rest of you, don't make any plans for Archivemania. 2007's the year of the Bomber, and the Rumble's going to be the first stop on that tour.

2007-02-27, 03:28 AM
Ah, the joys of Black Saber! You are your beautiful.

Unlike some of these *ugh* non Otaku people here. Listen up and listen good you good for nothings. I, Otaku, lover of all thing Otaku and the King of Otakuness have issued forth a command. All those that are seeking to win, turn back no lest you face the wrath of Otaku and his high-flying daredevil acts that will leave you out of the ring and possibly dead.

You see Saber, they are all unworthy of your love. They seek to defile what you stand for! No Longer! Otaku shall teach you all a lesson. And with his earned money, he shall buy more Otaku items! Bahwahahaa! Fear the might of the Otaku!

2007-02-27, 01:57 PM
The camera opens with D-Extreme facing the lens and addressing the fans. The view of D-Ex only shows his head and shoulders.

D-Ex: "Finally, I'm actually sober enough to speak...and now..its MY time to speak out to the AWF and the rest of its locker room..its MY time now and have MY say on the AWF Rumble! Yes, finally, D-Extreme will proclaim right now how he will win the rumble and how he will eliminate certain people out of it. No longer would I be kicked in the nads and tossed out, neither will I get superkicked outta the ring, not even a back injury would stop me like the last one either!"

D-Extreme has a grin on his face before he continues to speak.

D-Ex: "For the past few years, I have been a drunkard, a sloth..a slacker. Well for those of you to expect that I will be that man yet again once I step into those ropes, think again. This is a new beggining for the AWF, and it will be a new beggining for D-Extreme as well. No longer will I rely on the old D-Extreme ways of getting drunk before a match and rippin off sandman whenver possible. No more pukin out my lunch after I down an opponent, and no longer sleeping on the job. I will tell you all right now that I have been sober, for the past 24 hours and........and.......and...."

D-Extreme looks to his left, and then to his right, before he eventually looks back at the lens and shrugs.

D-Ex: ".....this is getting a bit boring.....I'm gonna have a beer now..."

D-Ex walks off camera and we hear an opening of a beer can in the background. Soon enough, we hear some gulping sounds before an echoing 'aahhh..' could be heard. But after that was heard, we hear a couple of more cans being opened, and soon enough more gulping down and burps would be heard. After a whole minute, D-Ex staggers back into the camera's view looking very drunk and NOT so sober unlike his previous position was.

D-Ex: "Oh yeah..where wassshh eye??? EH?! OH DAT! On the AWF rumble, I'mmma kill all yaaaaaahhhh...eheheh..heheh...*THUD!*"

As soon as D-Ex goes off the screen again, the camera pans down to see D-Extreme falling flat on his face. The scene soon fades as D-Ex starts to snore.

2007-02-27, 04:46 PM
Woah woah woah what's this?

The Lame, running his mouth as usual. Hey Lame. Shut up. You think TC and Viewfind and yourself and HBK can make a rumble? I'm sure you can, but the millions of fans tuning in to watch the Royal Rumble sure as hell don't want to see it.

Fact is this: The Double S is ready to roll, and I don't really give a damn about the competition. Sure, Stone Cold will be there, who's rubbed me up the wrong way recently - no, not that way you sick freaks!

And of course the Double S has some history with tweedle dum and tweedle dee, or DX, or whatever you call yourselves these days.

At the end of the day, the Welsh Wonder is in this thing to take names, and kick ass, and it doesn't really matter who's names I take, or who's ass I kick. It's all the same to me.

So Stone Cold. The Game. Karl Bollocks. Bombshell - the Wonder has one thing to say.

You want some?
Come get some!

2007-02-28, 08:32 AM
[generic "I'm going to win" guff]

[stock catchphrases]

~ The Heat; so good he doesn't even need to say anything anymore

Amarant Odinson
2007-03-01, 05:40 PM
An AWF camera crew is standing by with Amarant Odinson and Lisa Loveless.

LL: So Amarant, you've heard some of the comments from the other participants in the Rumble. One of the more disparaging remarks came from one of the members of BTU, The Game. He called you "Sergeant Snoozefest". Your reaction to that?

AO: [chuckle] You're kidding me, right? Those two Gereactric jackasses have the balls to call me boring? I'm sorry, but did you not see their little cage match last week? I mean let's review what happened.

Chris Back got his ass kicked, Mr Ashoka...got his ass kicked. Skywarp and Sixswitch were too busy kicking each others ass to bother with HBK or The Game. King, let's see here....got his ass kicked too and of course Reilly did as well. (Although I wasn't too disappointed about that.) Now we see BTU posing and celebrating and blah blah blah.....BORING!! What's next guys? A D-X crotch chop? A fat oily naked guy? If you want a cure for insomnia, watch that match.

Now I'll be the first to admit, back in the day. HBK and The Game were at the top of this industry. They were great, They were excellent. But that was then and the Rumble is now. You two may have had what it takes back then, but you two need realize that your time has come and gone. And I'm going to prove that when I take you both out in that Rumble at Edge of Survival and finally win the AWF World Heavyweight title.

You two can spout off all you want about how great you are and how bad you think you are. But at Edge of Survival, in the Rumble, you may think you're "better" than everyone else in that ring, But at the end of the night, when I have the AWF World Heavyweight title around my waist, you will realize once and for all that you two will never be BETTER THAN ME!!!!

2007-03-02, 04:27 AM
The joys of buying Anime Figures! You can't beat that in any way, shape or form.

So all I hear is jibba jabber from a couple of loser want to be's would would stop Otaku from getting his Otaku items. I don't really care if your the King of this or the Queen of that. If you believe that then good for you.

However if you come and stand in my way agianst my money which would prohibit me from buying my Otaku items than you all better be careful. Otaku does take his Otaku items and money seriously.

Why can't they understand the beauty and the articulation of the My HiME figures? These really are uneducated non-Otaku material.

Maximus Prime3
2007-03-05, 06:13 PM
this is going to be great. i will crush everyone in my path and i will also complete my destiny, to own the awf title

2007-03-14, 03:32 AM
Having finished 3 large onion and garlic pizzas, Baxter is full.

And now tipping the scales at close to 734 lbs.

Training is complete
I just hope I don't have a
Heart attack at the match.

Random Sweep
2007-04-06, 12:55 AM
Once again it sems that another year goes by and once again ve get the same oldworn out responses from the tired old flunkies in the locker room; a bunch worn out catchphrases and tired old cliches.

Wether you are "Comperting with destiny" or think that a Haiku will strike fear into your enemies is irrelevent because at the rumble there is only one thing that matters


Whileit would be novel to hold the AWF Title, I couldnt give a rats ass if I win or not. What matters is how many of you sorry sons of whores I can crippleand ruin on my way in and then out of the ring.

So bring your taglines and your poety and we see how that matches up against the colour of your blood on the canvas.

Lord Zarak
2007-04-08, 09:34 PM
One has to say, if you think that you can beat a Guinness fueled monstor, you have to be mistaken.