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Old 2012-08-04, 01:21 AM   #1
Auntie Slag
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Cambridge, UK
Thumbs down The dumbest/most annoying dialogue from films.

How do truly crap lines get into films. Can you list any particular lines that either drive you up the wall, are so bad they're funny or simply don't make any sense? I'm sure the Star Wars prequels are full of them, but the one that pisses me off thinking about it at the moment comes at the beginning of the first Tobey Maguire Spider Man film, where his narration says something like; "You really wanna know? Well I gotta warn you to turn away now, this movie is not for the faint of heart".

Shite like that makes me grind my teeth. A pointless namby threat originally pointed initially to the fee paying cinema audience. I wonder how many of them thought; "Oh well, I'd better go then. I'm not good with action and excitement".

Honestly, could they not have thought up something better than that?

Anakin Skywalker: "Are you an angel"? Such horrible delivery. And how about when he's up in space during that awful space battle sequence and he has to say to the audience "Whoa, this is tense"!

AAAAAARRRGH! ****ing kid, it's bad enough that Celia Imrie is up there shooting aliens. Why are all the fighters piloted by women, children and pets? What the **** is up with Naboo? Why are those skinny robots so stupid?

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Old 2012-08-04, 02:44 AM   #2
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Lowden, IA

I'll jump in with my least favorite Anakin line. I don't remember it exactly, but the wooden delivery and the obviously scripted jump for excitement while he says something like, "I Get To Go To Space Yi-Pee." Has stuck with me. (Ever so vividly, apparently.)

And the battle droids saying, "Roger roger" always bugged me to.

Not a bad line, per se, but in the first Matrix, Joe Pantoliano's mis-emphasis on a line always stuck out badly and made me wonder why nobody caught it. "The monitor program works FOR the construct..." Instead of "for the CONSTRUCT..."
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Old 2012-08-04, 03:39 AM   #3
Upstate, NY

My favorite so bad it's good/cheesy line of all time comes from Street Fighter (the one with Van Damme and Raul Julia). It's so absurd and it's made even more so by the context of it's delivery. Go watch Street Fighter if you like movies like that (it's also Raul Julia's final film, done because his kids asked him too).

M. Bison: "For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me, it was Tuesday."

I watch lots of bad movies because I love them so. I'm sure i can come up with some terrible lines.
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Old 2012-08-04, 04:36 AM   #4
Cellar Door
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I WANNER GO GET SOME POW-A CONVERT-ORS! To be fair, most of it's Hamill's delivery, which is why Harrison Ford went on to become a film star and Hamill went on to be in Wing Commander.

Killing Zoe's full of it... there was a rush of Tarantino clones around at the time full of forced shit like that.
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Old 2012-08-04, 08:44 AM   #5
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Somerset, England.

There's a guy at the end of the first Spider-Man, when they're all attacking Green Goblin, who shouts "I got somethin' for yo' ass!"
But the way he delivers it, rather than soundimg like a threat sounds like he's offering Dafoe a cream for his hemaroids

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Old 2012-08-07, 09:11 AM   #6
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Frankfurt, Germany

Anything where an actor has to mumble some techno jargon, that's almost always innacurate or just plain mumbo jumbo.

Sorry, but as a software engineer, my soul dies a little whenever I hear that sort of thing.
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Old 2012-08-07, 11:53 AM   #7
inflatable dalek
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"Hey, they killed Superman! Lets get'em!" from the second one. Ends as well as you'd expect for them.
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