TFARCHIVE FORUMS

The Hooligancons are causually battling the terrorist organization Cobra.

"I am Serpentor, Supreme Leader of..." Serpentor announces from his chariot, flying straight at the Hooligancons, guns blazing.

Steeltoe swats Serpentor into the ground, resulting in a muffled explosion. "Failing miserably?" the robot asks.

Cobra Commander laughs at his rival's fate.

"We cannot possibly defeat these machines! We must fall back!" Destro complains to him.

The Commander nods, and gives the order. "Strategic Retreat! He, Destro, Stormshadown, and the Baroness head for a Cobra Helicopter.

"Oh no ya don't!" Tirejack yells, leaping over the entire army. He takes countless hits in the process, but is unharmed when he lands at the back of the army, blocking Cobra Commander and his crew from getting to the chopper. Tirejack swipes up Cobra's now-unquestionable supreme leader, and the calmly strides back to his comrades, stepping on several vehicles and some Cobra troops in the process.

"Retreat!!! RETREAT!!!" Destro barks the order, as he and the others get into the helicopter, which is about to take off. The entire Cobra army does a collective fallback.

"Wait until Snake sees this!" Tirejack yells to Molotov.

"Heh heh heh heh." The Hooligancon Incendiary Expert laughs.

"I can't wait until I meet that 2nd rate imposter, so I can spit in his face!" Cobra Commander screeches.

"Well, that'll be hard, since both of you wear masks." Tirejack mocks, before locking the Commander in a storage compartment.

"More incoming aircraft." Wrench announces. "A lot of them.

"Well then... Hooligancons; MERGE FOR THE KILL! HA HA HA HA HA!" Steeltoe laughs.

The six Hooligancons merge into their gestalt form; the super-hooligan Angus MacPain.

"Well lads, looks like it's time for us to kick some dents in yer arse!" Angus MacPain chuckles

The aircraft move in; they are the Evangelion Mechas. They lock their weapons and fire.

"We will not allow you to get Hubcap!!" Shinji yells over a loudspeaker.

Angus Macpain stands motionless, effortlessly taking the incoming fire.

"Bah... pathetic. Now, if ye'll excuse me fer a moment." He activates his force-shield bubble. Then he takes out a giant bottle of Glenmorangie and pours some into an empty energon cube.

"Cheers." he raises the cube and then slams it down. He puts the booze away and lowers the shields.

The Evangelions circle around and redouble their attacks. But it is unavailing; their weapons have absolutely no effect.

"This cannot be!" Rei yells at them.

"Oh, it can lass; we've been trough eleven World Cup riots an' never even suffered scuffed pain from it." MacPain gloats.

"World Cup riots?!!! OH SH*T! RETREAT!!!!!!!!!" Shiniji yells panickedly over the loudspeaker.

Angus MacPain watches them leave, then splits back into his component Transformers.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! And we didn't even have to brandish the Electro-Tire chain. How many times have we heard the desperate "Retreat!" call today?" Tirejack mocks.

"Thirty-six."

"Thirty-Seven." Molotov says with the synthesized voice of Dante Hicks.

"Shut Up!" Tirejack yells. Then he breaks into laughter "Heh heh heh heh heh... I love that flick."

<<<TRANSITION>>>

A Volvo XC90 rolls across the autobaghn, on a heading following that of the CobraCoERS. The Archivers are onboard.

"You sure that thing is working right?" Blaster_86 sits up and looks forward.

"No, it's completely wrong and we're actually following the world's most violent litterbugs." Brend points to the road.

Devastation lies along their path: craters, sorch marks, and various debris heaped over the landscape.

"Oh, looks like the Sailor Moon chicks had a nasty run-in with the sandblaster from hell." TC84 notices the tattered remains sailor suits and broken senshi weaponary admist a deep channel cut into the ground, all of which is covered in a heavy dusting of sand.

"And it seems that the Juggernaut CAN be stopped. I sure as hell hope I don't ever have run into whatever did that." Denyer looks at the body of The Juggernaut; he has been cut in half and his head has been taken off below the neck.

They continue down the road some. There are dozens dead humans, laying in pools of blood, crushed to death by stealth anvils. They are dressed in full nazi uniform, and WWII-era weapons are scattered all over the place.

"And according to that crumpled banner over there, our friends at CobraCo ran across the Global Socialist White People's Party during their annual get-together here in Germany." Brend surveys the scene.

"White People's Party? You mean, like the Illinois Nazis?" Denyer asks.

"I hate Illinois Nazis..." Bombshell says, not even looking up from his gameboy advance.

"I don't think CobraCo is fond of them either, judging by the sheer number of anvils that were used to crush them all to death." Brend notes.

They continue along, and then Brend swerves off the road, up onto the shoulder. The road ahead has been chewed up by some kind of weapons fire. There are burnt-out hulks of cylinderical robots scattered all over the place. They continue along the shoulder, avoiding the obstacles. One of the robots, somewhat intact, turns towards the car.

"EXTER...Mi...nate..." It yells, before falling apart.

"They sure did." Denyer notes the number of destroyed robots.


End Installment Eight
(We're at the halfway point now.)

Halfway? Anyone remember how long Archivers 1 was...? Seems like this is much longer.

i dont know, im not in it though......

Excellent work, but it woulda been sweet if you guys gave me the Illinois Nazi line, considering Im one of the only two people on this board from Illinois

Originally posted by Redstreak
Halfway? Anyone remember how long Archivers 1 was...? Seems like this is much longer.

Basic rules of sequels:

Longer, more complicated, and garanteed to be better.

Originally posted by Bombshell


Basic rules of sequels:

Longer, more complicated, and garanteed to be better.

*Points to the Scream movies, MIB 2, the last two Batmans*

Originally posted by ThunderCracker84


*Points to the Scream movies, MIB 2, the last two Batmans*

Kevin Williamson and Joel Schumaucher have nothing to do with archivers...

I mean, I've hired Joel to take out my trash cans out and put them back for me at a rate of $3.50 a week, but I haven't even let him look at AII...