TFARCHIVE FORUMS

The pyro ignites to bring Mayhem to the Airwaves lives from The Pengrowth Saddledome in Calgary, Alberta Canada

Joey: We are live from the Pengrowth Saddledome in lovely Calgary, home of wrestling greats Bret Hart, and the legendary Hart Family. And its another edition of Mayhem…lets get right to it!

Stone Cold Skywarp & D-Extreme v The Gruff & Cloudstrifer

Joey: This match looks like a setup. Stone Cold Skywarp is in a tag match and he is facing off against Gruff and Cloudstrifer.

Flec: Poor Gruff!! Still, the best part is who Stone Cold's tag partner is... D-Extreme. Yes, the very same man who helped Stone Cold eliminate Gruff in last week's 11 Man Battle Royal, only to be cheap shotted and knocked out of the ring by SCS.

Joey: To further add to the confusion, Cloud was partially eliminated by SCS also, so everyone in the match has a reason to want SCS to go down. Here come Gruff and Cloudstrifer now. Looks like they couldn't agree on entrance music, because their approaching the ring in silence. The two men are still talking strategy as they make their way to the ring, and they seem to be receiving a lukewarm reaction from the Calgary fans.

Glass Shatters

Joey: Nice pop from the crowd. Odd... SCS's entrance music just cut for D-Extreme's. SCS doesn't seem to mind. Maybe it's his way of making up for the stunner he gave to D-Extreme last week.

Flec: I doubt it. He's realizing that against Gruff he needs anything he can get. I doubt he's sincere in the slightest.

Joey: Cloud and D-Extreme will start us off. D-Extreme gets the early advantage with a few swift punches. He presses the advantage with a boot to the midsection followed by a side headlock. Cloud pushes him off and into the ropes. On the rebound, D-Extreme levels Cloud with a stiff shoulder block.

Flec: Cloud's doing something useful for a change. He just tripped up D-Extreme, and now he's laying into him with punches while both men are on the mat. Good one! Poke the eye! Poke the eye!

Joey: Please Flec. Cloud pulls D-Extreme up, and sends him back down to the mat with a jawbreaker. Tag is made, and Gruff's in the match. He's letting D-Extreme tag in SCS.

Flec: Hard tag made by D-Extreme. More like a chop than a tag. I knew he couldn't be all bad!

Joey: Gruff and SCS size each other up, both men have a steel gaze locked on the other. Gruff starts first with a hard right, SCS responds. Both men are trading blows. I shouldn't have to remind you people how much these competitors dislike each other. Gruff cost SCS his IC title. SCS's fed Gruff stunner after stunner. They are still exchanging blows, but Gruff's losing ground. Two shots in a row from SCS, and Gruff is reeling backwards.

Flec: Right into his corner where Cloud leveled SCS with a clothesline. That's what I like to see. Gruff is immediately going to
work. DDT sends SCS back to the mat. Cover gets only 2. Slow count ref!!!

Joey: Please. SCS is in trouble though. Gruff has taken control. Gruff turns a front face lock quickly into spot where he can deliver a back suplex. Again a cover for 2. Two Germans, and another cover gets 2.

Flec: He's wasting time with the covers. Cover him with a steel chair, that'll do the trick.

Joey: SCS is hurt. He's slow getting to his feet. Gruff charges for a clothesline. SCS ducks. Coming off the ropes, Gruff just got hit with a high knee. SCS's following with boots. He's got Gruff trapped in a neutral corner, and he's stomping away. Ref breaks it up, and Stone Cold goes to tag in D-Extreme.

Flec: What a tag! Hard right sends D-Extreme to the canvas. SCS just goes outside the ring like it was a love tap.

Joey: D-Extreme gets up, glares at SCS, and enters the ring to face Gruff. Gruff is back to his feet, and begins to advance.

Flec: Wow! D-Extreme just spun and taged SCS back in.

Joey: I guess that counts as a tag. X-Ocution from D-Extreme leaves SCS a heap on the mat. Gruff's taking advantage. QUick tag only gets 2. He hits a spinebuster, and follows with the sharpshooter. SCS somehow manages to make it to the ropes.

Flec: A pity too. He got what he deserved.

Joey: I can't really blame D-Extreme after what SCS did to him last week, or after that hard right. Gruff goes for the Ibrox Drop, but SCS counters and goes for a small package rollup. Gruff escapes, lifts him to his feet, and it's an Irishwhip to the ropes. No, counter by SCS, Gruff's running, blind tag made by Cloud.

Flec: Poor Gruff. Lou Thez Press, and SCS's trying to make Gruff as ugly as himself. Hmm, not all that much weight behind those shots.

Joey: He was hit with a X-Ocution and suffered through a sharpshooter. SCS doesn't know Cloud's in the ring. He's up, Stunner attempt on Gruff, but he shoves SCS away.

Flec: Right into an Odin's Spear! My God, Cloud's covering, D-Extreme is restrained by Gruff, and Cloud gets the 1..2..3 Ragnarok is near!

Joey: D-Extreme doesn't look all that happy. I think he let his anger get the best of him, and now he regrets it. Still, with SCS's reputation for attacking his own teammates, it was only a matter of time. Oh, this is getting sick.

Flec: Hardly, Gruff is just returning a few of the kicks SCS gave him. He's really working over the former IC champ.

Joey: Ref's calling for the bell again and again. He tries to intervene, but Gruff just shoved him down. Looks like Cloud and D-Extreme have had enough. They're pulling Gruff off of Stone Cold and together they are forcing him roughly to the back.

The Archivetron flashes on and we see we hear
nTo as we see images of Cyberstrike piledriving
Cane off a ladder onto a guitar and we see him nailing the The Game off the top rope with the Skyboom Drop off the top rope on to nails.
We hear
Let's fight!
We're face to face.
Where loyalty is what I need to see from you.
You're insecure. I can see the fear that breeds in your heart!
Where will you run?
Where will you hide?
I see the blood drip from your eyes
Who will survive?
Lets get it on!
Lets fight!
I know you are the leader of lost souls.
You can't kill me!
I'm Immortal!

We see letters:

C-champion
Y-young
B-badass
E-extreme
R-rich
S-superstar
T-talented
R-returns
I-immortal
K-killer
E-entertainer

Cyberstrike returns in two weeks!

JHA: And no one cares!

Tempest Vs RCOSD

JFA: “Well last time we saw Tempest he ran in on Sixs..”
JHA: “No one cares.”
JFA: “Well I...”
JHA: “No”
JFA: “Think that”
JHA: “One”
JFA: “The people...”
JHA: “Cares...”

Rotterdam Terror Corps’ Brutal Attack hits as the One Man Army begins a march down to the ring as he gets ready for a Match with Tempest ignoring the crowd.

JFA: “Well there is RCOSD, the one man army who will be facing off against Tempest tonight who last time we saw..”
JHA: “No one cares!”
JFA: “HeinterferedinSixswitch’smatch!”
JHA: “Oh yeah say it quick, real smart”

Once RCOSD is in the music Tempest’s music hurts as he comes out dressed like a mix Viewfind and Mr.T in a lot of gold chains and shades as he walks down to ring being heckled by everyone at ring side.

JFA: “I know he is GPA now but isn’t that a bit eccentric?”
JHA: “THE GOLD! IT BLINDS MY EYES!”
JFA: “I take that as a yes”

Tempest tries to slide into the ring by grinds to a halt on the gold chains. His legs kicking to try and get himself into the ring but RCOSD helps with it by grabbing the chains and dragging him into the center of the ring before stepping around and standing over his back pulling the chains up and choking him The referee pulls RCOSD away after ringing the bell. RCOSD backs up letting him take all his chains off and then his shades. He show boats a little bit forgetting that this match has started and is drilled by a hard clothes line by RCOSD.

JFA: “Well those chains certainly served a purpose”
JHA: “I can’t see, the chains blinded me.. what’s going on... please hold me Jay... I’m scared”
JFA: “Well now I am scared too... RCOSD pulling Tempest back to his feet and Tempest blocks a punch and starts firing back with lefts and rights he has the One Man Army off Guard. Irish whip into the corner followed up with an avalanche splash. RCOSD bounces out of the corner met by a knee lift by Tempest. Quick pin by the new member of the GPA. He gets a two count from RCOSD and now pulling him back to a vertical base.”
*JHA falls out of his chair and is crawling around*
Tempest applies a reverse lock on RCOSD hitting a German suplex then standing up and turning RCOSD onto his back grabbing his leg and lifting it up before thrusting it down landing it on the knee softening the leg up for the sharpshooter. He does this attack on the legs a few times before pulling RCOSD up and going for a standstill clothes line but RCOSD ducks and quickly turns it into a neck breaker.

JFA: “Smart move by the One Man Army getting himself sometime to breathe. Well I am the only one announcing now as my announcing partner just crawled off the stage and landed on the tech people below so I am announcing this alone. Tempest and RCOSD getting slowly back to their feet both men locking up now. Tempest breaking the hold and sliding behind RCOSD there’s a back drop by the Australian.. Pulling RCOSD back up now and there is an Irish whip.”

After bouncing back from the Irish whip RCOSD his power slammed by Tempest who goes for the pin and again only gets the two count before glaring at the referee and demanding the close count be a three but is denied. Crying about gold chains can be heard slowly crawling towards the ring. Tempest pulls RCOSD too the corner and begins to stomp on the chest and head of the One Man Army.

JFA: “Well Jay Aitch Eh is now crawling around ringside crying about blindness and he... just crawled head first into the steps. A recovery and now he is climbing into the ring. Tempest beginning to stomp on the knees now and I he is climbing the ropes. And Jay is crawling into the referee! This is just comedic! The referee now trying to deal with my Screaming partner as Tempest gets ready to J... SIXSWITCH! The referee is distracted by Jay and Tempest doesn’t see the Welsh Wonder! He’s ready to jump and... Sixswitch Shoves him off the rope! He landed on his head and he has to be out cold! RCOSD is getting up and the Referee as gotten Jay out of the ring! RCOSD is up! HE hauls Tempest up! BASEMENT BREAKER! 1....2...3! RCOSD has won and Sixswitch has gotten revenge for last week!

On the Couch with Auntie Slag

A slightly different blend of jazz music plays tonight as Auntie Slag reveals himself to the Canuck crowd in a glorious finery of multi-hued chiffon and jet black pumps with razor edge heels the likes of which could cleave a mighty Orc of the white hand in twain.
A furious applause greets each footfall such that he positively glides along the fake marbleised floor panelling (a feat which any of you transvestites out there will know is quite an achievement).

Auntie: “Alberta Alberta, where you been so long”?

No-one answers, for song references over ten years old are apt to fall upon deaf ears in this day and age.

Auntie: “Ok fine. Welcome to ‘On The Couch’, with me the ultimate sexual dimorphist. I tell you with such a handle I could be the next X-Man. But enough about me, well no, I can never get enough about me, I’m so gorgeous. But seriously, I welcome tonight’s guest as the reigning TV Championship titleholder and man of many a disgruntled word. He can certainly mince meat with the best of ‘em and has ripped new asses out of many a hole on more than one occasion. So please put your webbed fingers together for.... AMARANT ODINSON!!!

‘More Human Than Human’ gets Auntie’s patented in-house M.O.R. light jazz treatment as the gruffly exteriored, inhospitably interiored, seminally reviled AO slouches his way onto the set. He glares to the hick audience and they boo and cuss his appearance, which rounds to a commotion of ‘Amarant Sucks’. Quickly Auntie leaps to his feet, kicks off a pump and hurls it with laser-guided precision into the forehead of a mulleted gimp in the third row. Mullet man slumps into his seat with his eyes still open and wearing a look of shock, but he is very obviously dead.
The audience falls silent. Amarant looks vaguely impressed, and a backstage runner quickly passes Auntie a replacement pump.

Auntie: “Sorry about that Amarant, although I consider each and every one of them my children, some are a little more inbred than most. Conservative culling has its benefits in the long run. George W. taught me that”.

Amarant: “Er...”

Auntie: “But anyway, Amarant; welcome to my lovely show. Its such a pleasure to sit on bath taps, but I digress”.

Amarant: “You do a lot of that”.

Auntie: “Experience lad, you should learn to appreciate it”.

Amarant: “Now you’re just shamelessly ripping off Tra-”

Auntie: “Aha ha ha ha! Um.... Amarant, Amarant Odinson, hardly silent rabidity and therefore hardly a Queensryche pseudo-homage. Answer me these questions three, or thy fate you will see”.

Amarant: “...”.

Auntie: “That’s the best thing you’ve said so far, but if you’d care to elaborate with this next question, I’m sure some of the fans might wake up. So, do you still think you’re better than Blaster?

Amarant: “He beat me fair and square, I won't deny that. But he was lucky. That Tapedeck likes to run his mouth about how he's the God Among Men and so on and that’s fine. He can be as delusional as he wants. I'm better than him and he knows it. He just got lucky, that’s all”.

Auntie: “That was some lovely choking action you had going on there with the former AWF champ. In fact, the ref had to pull you off (matron!) for fear of you doing him serious damage. Clearly you are a rabid wolverine, but how rabid? What was going through your mind during that time”?

Amarant: “I wanted to show that punk Blaster why he shouldn't have tried to hold me back when I was part of his Cassettes. He was afraid of my talent. He knew I was better than him. He knew that it was only a matter of time before I upstaged him. That's why he would always pair me up with Bombshell or Plasmodium. He never gave me an opportunity to shine. So, I decided to pay him back”.

Auntie: “We’ve heard you voice your discontent for the Warzone line-up in the great Warzone v. Mayhem bake-off... who would you have chosen to be on Team Warzone that fateful night? Who would have been with you to forge ahead and change the course of history”?

Amarant: “My team would've been Blood & Thunder, the tag team champs, Brave Maximus, and myself. Unfortunately, because of the team I would've had together, the match would only be five minutes long with all five members of Team Warzone still standing. With a team like that, there would've been no way that Team Mayhem could PROVE US WRONG”.

Auntie: “Ok now I’m sure this one has been dogging many a fan since your arrival in the AWF; what is that thing in your sig? To me it looks like a sock doing an impression of the cockerel on a box of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes. Tell us what it actually is, because I’ve got a lot of money riding on your answer”.

Amarant: “If you ask me another stupid question like that, I'll make you tap faster than I did to poor Ms. Lisa Lovelace or that other jackass that interviewed me last week. Understood????

Auntie: “Meow! So, what is the difference between a wolverine and rabid wolverine? Apart from the medical difference of being bitten by a rabid one, I can’t really see any”.

Amarant: “Wolverines are one of the toughest animals up in the North. They can take down animals much bigger then them quite easily. Picture a beast like that. A nasty, brutal killing machine that shows no remorse whatsoever. Now if he's rabid, then whatever fear that was in him is gone. Everything that is mean and vicious about the animal is intensified by 1000. That's a Rabid Wolverine and that's the kind of intensity that I bring the ring every single week when I defend my T.V. Title. NO MERCY, NO REMORSE, NO PITY”.

Auntie: “Who in your opinion is the most overrated wrestler on the AWF circuit”?

Amarant: “There are too many to count. But I have two right now that bug me more than anybody else. The Women's Cha...I mean I.C. Champ: Scout, and the second best technical wrestler in the AWF: Mat Man. Mat Man is nothing more than a punk, and Scout is his bitch. Neither one of them should even be here. Mat Man hasn't done anything to prove why he thinks he's better than me. I mean c'mon, the kid got beat by Cloudy the Viking.

As for Scout, there is good reason why she should have the I.C. Title right now. First off, she beat up a drunken jackass for it and I already beat her once at Meltdown. I could do it again no problem. Hell, I'll make them both tap out if I have to”.

Auntie: “I am loathe to say this but... the AWF has been fraught with somewhat questionable refereeing and it has been to the detriment of almost every wrestler at some point. What one match do you feel most cheated out of in your entire career? What one match keeps you awake at night”?

Amarant: “That match I had with Tapedeck is bugging me because I don't think I tapped out. In fact, I KNOW I NEVER TAPPED OUT. But, there isn't much I can do about now. I'll just wait until Tapedeck gets the World Title and then I'll kick his ass and take it from him”.

Auntie: “Who has been the most fun to beat up”?

Amarant * An evil grin comes over his face.*: “Anyone that interviews me”.

*In an instant, Amarant grabs Auntie Slag and puts him/her into a Crossface Chickenwing, screaming "SAY IT!!! SAY IT GOD DAMN IT". Security people come down and have to pry Amarant off Slag*

Auntie: “Well god-DAMN if he isn’t a livewire. Folks we are out of time but I hope you found this Neanderthal interesting. He’s certainly got plenty of hatred for Mat Man, Blaster and Scout, and... wait a minute... my hair! HE’S RUFFLED MY HAIR!!! OH THAT IS IT... NURSE! prep this bitch. Now Amarant I’m gonna get medieval on yo’ ass with a pair o’ pliers an’ a blowtorch”.

Auntie lights the torch, letting the flame flicker close to his devilish smile

Auntie: “To my fine crew, you can either keep filming or cut right now, I really don’t give a rats --”

*All transmissions are cut. A commercial for ‘The life and times of Deadpool’, which is now available in soft back runs abruptly to make the cut into the next match as seamless as possible*

Flec: He disturbs me…every single time I see him…

Joey: Speaking of disturbances, lets cut back stage where there is a rather significant disturbance…

Backstage

The cameras cut to show the GPA assaulting Xille and Brave Maxx…Tempest, Viewfind, Ravage, P? and Divebomb are accosting the teammates.

Joey: And…what…and there’s Divebomb with a steel chair, levelling Xille, Ravage then scooping up the debris and dropping him hard with a powerbomb!

Flec: And hey…here comes Auros & Bombshell! Auros and Bombshell going after the NWA! Viewfind working over Brave Maxx, with a little help from Tempest…and WAIT! WHAT THE HELL?!? WHAT IS THIS THE CIRCUS?

Joey: Quick Switch and God Jinrai out back there…Jinrai and Bombshell immediately begin hammering away on each other…this is compete chaos and here comes AWF security along with Mr. Reilly.

Reilly: ENOUGH! That’s it! THAT IS IT! I don’t care who had what match…I DON’T CARE! YOU ARE ALL OUT OF HERE!

Joey & Flec: WHAT?!?

Reilly: You damn well heard me…I’m not going to tolerate any of this junk from any of you! You want to kill each other…I don’t care. Do it in the ring or in bar or in some alley…BUT DO NOT THINK FOR ONE DAMN MINUTE…that I will let you ruin my show…so as of now, you are all out of here! Get the hell out of here!

Flec: What…what about the number one contenders match…

Joey: I don’t know…but AWF Security is escorting everyone out of the building! The GPA, Quick Switch & Jinrai, Auros & Bombshell, even Xille and Brave Maxx…and…I guess this has cost us two matches!

Commercial: Joey Styles Voice Over to scenes of the AWF Superstars in their most devastating matches…

These men are athletes…

They are trained to push their bodies to the very limits of the human condition…

They will risk harm and injury to entertain…

Their pain is real…in an instant, careers can end, lives can be shattered, bodies can be broken…please…don’t try this at home!

Hardcore Title: TC (c) v OP2005

Joey : And it looks like our next match has started early...
Flec : So early Thundercracker's barely outta his car!
Joey : OP2005 wasting no time in his attempts to secure the Hardcore title!

Camera crew rushes outside to catch the action as it starts off in the parking lot with OP2005 choking the life out of Thundercracker, OP2005 drags TC out of his car, leg first raising the knee up and slamming it hard into the concrete.

Joey : OP2005 looking to take out TC's weapons ASAP
Flec : In english?
Joey : OP2005 going straight to work on TC's legs...
Flec : ohhhhhh....

OP2005 stomps away at TC as he lies prone on the floor, TC rolls away steadily climbing to his feet. OP2005 runs in for a clothesline but TC ducks under and hits OP2005 with a stiff reverse kick to the chin. OP2005 picks himself up only to be met by a blast from a nearby fire extinguisher and a leg-sweep take down.

Joey : You can't keep a good man down!
Flec : So why's OP2005 on the floor?
Joey : Cos he's gettin a grade A whuppin'

TC goes for a short Rolling Thunder, but OP2005 has it scouted and rolls out of the way. He scoops up TC and ...

Joey : By the god of all that is holy!
Flec : Yay! CARnage!
Joey : *sighs*

...pump-handle slams TC down hard onto a car bonnet. Cover....2 count. TC rolls down the bonnet and reaches underneath the car. OP2005 stoops down only to be met by a metal bar to the head, OP2005 stumbles backwards as TC lifts himself up and stumbles away. OP2005 quickly gives chase, soon catching up with him.

Flec : Don't matches traditionally take place in the ring?
Joey : Let's face it, Hardcore matches are anything BUT traditional!

TC turns to meet OP2005 with a roundhouse kick which fails to connect, OP2005 grabs TC and hoists him high above his head gorilla pressing TC into a trash container! The lid slams shut on TC as OP2005 takes time to grab his breath and check his head, a slow trickle of blood has started to appear from the earlier metal bar to the head.

Joey : OP2005 seeing red here...
Flec : He doesn't usually mind, but it's not normally his blood...

OP2005, enraged, heads over to the trash container as the lid flies open and connects with his chin.

Joey : TC playing possum there...
Flec : Aww, look, he's gone to get some first aid
Joey : I doubt you get first aid on top of an ambulance
Flec : He's insane!
Joey : You might be right, TC atop that ambulance, you've gotta be kidding TC, don't do it, you'll kill yourself!

TC signals for the five-star frog splash and leaps from the top of the ambulance, but he left it too long and OP2005 rolls out of the way.

Joey : IS HE STILL BREATHING?!
CROWD : HOLY ****! HOLY ****! HOLY ****!
Flec : For once I agree...
Joey : HOLY...That's the damnedest thing I ever saw!

OP2005 lifts up TC onto his shoulder and slams him head-first through fire doors and into scaffolding, TC hits the floor hard and rolls through the curtains.

Joey : The crowd going nuts here as the action finally enters the arena.
Flec : OP2005's taking his time...
Joey : There's the reason!
Flec : Always thinking ahead!

OP2005 comes through the curtains, clutching a chair, to a chorus of boos from the crowd. OP2005 pauses to yell abuse at the crowd before turning his attention back to TC. OP2005 swings down and TC who's already up on his feet...

Joey : ENDER! ENDER! ENDER!
Flec : There you go with yelling things three times again...
Joey : TC taking advantage of the falls-count-anywhere rule
Flec : And still only manages a two count!

TC runs down to the ring and starts rummaging around underneath the ring, throwing various weapons and items into the ring, he climbs onto the ring apron. OP2005 charges down the aisle only to be met by an Asai Moonsault! TC lifts himself up and slides into the ring, OP2005 makes his way to the ring edge, TC runs and goes for a baseball slide, but OP2005 side-steps and hits a massive clothesline.

Flec : Now it's time for OP2005 to clean some rubbish up from underneath the ring
Joey : He's sure taking his time under there...

OP2005 emerges dragging a ladder out with him, he lifts it high and throws it over the top rope, into the ring. OP2005 stomps on TC a couple of times for good measure before sliding into the ring and propping up the ladder in a corner.

Joey : You can only imagine that no good will come of this..
Flec : Oh, I don't know
Joey : You're sick
Flec : Actually, I feel fine, but thanks for your concern.

TC rolls back into the ring, OP2005 walks over and stamps hard on his back. OP2005 lifts TC to his feet, he sets about TC throwing punches all over, head shots and body shots. OP2005 whips RVD into the corner opposite the ladder, over quickly with hard shoulder charges.

Joey : TC in obvious pain, that earlier missed frog splash could be the deciding factor.
Flec : His hardcore title definitely in jeapordy here.
Joey : It could well be...

OP2005 grabs TC's arm and whips him hard into the opposite corner, TC's back clashing hard with the steel of the ladder. OP2005 charges towards TC who leap frogs him, OP2005's momentum keeps him running and he shoulder charges the ladder! TC grabs OP2005's legs and drags him to the centre of the ring. TC runs to the corner where the ladder is propped and climbs round the outside.

Joey : What's he doing...
Flec : TC lives on the edge of extreme
Joey : Edge? TC is the mayor of extremesville!

TC stand atop the turnbuckle and signals to the crowd for the 5Star Frog Splash. The crowd goes almost silent as TC pushes the ladder forwards, as it connects with the body of OP2005 TC takes flight, flash bulbs fill the arena as the volume of the crowd picks up. TC connects with the ladder atop OP2005 and the crowd goes absolutely insane! A strong chant of 'HOLY ****' blasts through the arena as TC crawls to OP2005 and claims the three count.

RA : Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner of this match and STILL AWF HARDCORE CHAMPION -- THUNDERCRACKER!

Paramedics run to the ring to check on both men as they lay in the ring, TC is holding his ribs and OP2005 still hasn't moved, the cut on his head has leaked a lot of blood.

Joey : What a crazyman!
Flec : We wouldn't expect any less from the WHOLE F'N SHOW!

An advertisement is shown for the Edge of Survival PPV!

The Game & Blaster v The King and HBK Sean O'Con

Joey: “Tell them what we got coming up, ‘Flec.”

‘Flec: “Right, Styles. Ladies and germs, coming up next we got a match between two of the top superstars in the company today and two talent lacking hacks and the biggest pains in the rear the company has ever had.”

Joey: “I gotta agree with you, Styles. The people have been against Sean and the King lately.?”

‘Flec: “What? No! I mean that Sean and the King are the superstars, and Blaster and the Game are the hacks.”

Joey: “I’ll be sure to let them know that after the match.”

‘Flec: “You do that.”

Joey: “Be sure to reserve that luxury suite at the hospital.”

‘Flec: “What?”

5…4…3…2…1…

One of a Kind blares as the Canadian flag appears on the ArchiveTron, signaling the arrival of the number one contender to the AWF title, the rest of the Canucks following behind.

Joey: “Well, looks like Blaster brought some backup.”

‘Flec: “What are you getting at, Styles?”

Joey: “Oh, come on. Don’t tell me you’ve never noticed all the wrongdoings and mishaps that have occurred whenever one of those guys follows Blaster to the ring.”

‘Flec: “Can’t say that I have.”

Joey: “Now why doesn’t that surprise me?”

‘Flec: “I dunno. I guess your life is real boring. I wonder why that doesn’t surprise
me.”

Joey: “Then again, if you ask me, I guess we got a case of the lesser of two evils going on here.”

‘Flec: “I didn’t.”

Joey: “You didn’t what?”

‘Flec: “Ask.”

TIME TO PLAY THE GAME! MUH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!

Joey: “And here come the Game Erik Summers, who at Edge Of Survival will take on one half of his opponents here tonight to settle months of differences between the two.

‘Flec: “Please, Styles. No one cares about that? Everyone’s hoping on the fact that King is going to mop the floor with Blaster and the rest of his Mother Canuckers.”

Joey: “If he doesn’t take care of it tonight.”

‘Flec: “Are you talking about Blaster?”

Joey: “Of course. Who do you think?”

‘Flec: “Who am I to say how you spend your paycheck?”

Joey: “And to the sounds of Superstar’s “Saliva”, here comes their opponents, the King and…

‘Flec: “BRENDINIO HEAT!!!!!!!”

Joey: “Ugh. Like nails on the blackboard, it is.”

‘Flec: “Oh, please. Like you got that heavenly singing shower voice, Styles.”

Joey: “At least I know when to shut up…and now King and Sean stepping into the ring now…Sean giving a good long look at Bombers…we all know the history between those two.”

‘Flec; “Keyword being ‘history’. Focus on the present, Styles.”

Joey:’ “Can do. It looks like Sean and the Game wanna start it off here…”

‘Flec: “YAY! EDGE OF SURVIVAL SNEAK PEEK!”

Joey: “…but both King and Blaster wisely dragging their partners to their respective corners and telling them in no uncertain words to keep it bottled up till the PPV.”

‘Flec: “KILLJOYS!”

Joey: “And Blaster and King starting it off now…Blaster getting in several knife edged chops…King backing away into the corner…Blaster whipping him across the ring…King ducks the clothesline attempt…and hits Blaster with the Headstrong!”

‘Flec: “Good. Maybe we’ll get an early ending out of this.”

Joey: “And King with the cover…and here comes the Game to break it up. Now he’s taking a look over at Sean O’Con, exchanging some very choice words.”

‘Flec: “I’m surprised that the Game can form a coherent sentence, considering he comes from the slums.”

Joey: “Minnesota isn’t the slums, dumbass!”

‘Flec: “Maybe not in your cookie cutter world.”

Joey: “And now King dragging Blaster to his corner…tagging in Sean, who gives the Game an evil glare…and now picking up Blaster and trapping him in an overhead wristlock…and taking him down with a spinning heel kick…and now he’s tossing Blaster towards the Game…what’s he doing?”

‘Flec: “It looks like he wants Blaster to tag in the Game so that they can settle their business.”

Joey: “And Blaster trying to get the tag now…the Game extending his hand…but Sean in to drag Blaster away from the Game, obviously irate. Sean’s doing little more than taunting the Game, messing around with his head.

‘Flec: “Funny. I didn’t think that he had anything in that head to mess around with.

Joey: “And the Game going ballistic as Sean drags Blaster out to the center of the ring, dropping several elbows to the number 1 contender for the AWF title. Quick tag…and King climbing the ropes now, looking for the Divebomb…Blaster getting up…and the ref getting distracted by the Game’s temper tantrum…and Blitzwing coming up on the outside…and shoving King off the turnbuckle!”

‘Flec: “I told you that those no good Canucks would be up to something.”

Joey: “Actually, I was the one who said that.”

‘Flec: “Details, details.”

Joey: “And now Sean heading to the outside to deal with the Canucks…Bombshell getting into Sean’s face…we already touched upon the long and sordid history between these two…and now Arcee getting in between them…and Arcee trying to slap Sean…Sean blocks…and lands a MASSIVE hand to Bombers girlfriend!”

‘Flec: “That’s it. He’s a dead man.”

Joey: “And Bombers completely losing it…being held back by Blitzwing and Auros as Sean heads back to his corner laughing…what a disgusting human being, striking a woman. He aught to be ashamed of himself.”

‘Flec: “Why? If she’s hanging around with Bombers, she can’t exactly be considered a woman, can she?”

Joey: “And while we’ve been yakking, King has been taking it to Blaster in the ring…whipping him into the corner…and Blaster with the blind tag to the Game! The Game is in…but the ref is distracted on the outside trying to calm down Bombers! I don’t think he saw it!”

‘Flec: “Bombers, you idiot! You’re gonna cost your boss the match! Stop acting like a two year old! You know, I’m beginning to agree with Jinrai, Styles. She shouldn’t be allowed out here.”

Joey: “And now the Game laying it to the King…and now a kick to the gut…setting up for the Pedigree…and Sean calling the ref’s attention…and now the ref ordering the Game back to his corner!”

‘Flec: “Ha! That will teach you to come in without being tagged, G!”

Joey: “He DID get tagged in, you idiot? Are you wearing those special glasses again?”

‘Flec: “What special glasses?”

Joey: “You know. The ones that make you see only what you want to?”

‘Flec: “Not at all, Styles. I’m just telling it like it is. Calling it straight down the middle.”

Joey: “Dude…April Fool’s day isn’t for another four months. Do us all a favor, and save the jokes till then. And now Blaster stepping in rather reluctantly, arguing with the ref that there was a tag…and a swift kick cuts that argument off…King following up by whipping Blaster into the ropes…another kick to the gut…and now King trying to land the Tantrum on Blaster…but Blaster struggling….King trying again…and Blaster reversing the move, sending King flying to the ground! Blaster falls too.”

‘Flec: “This could be it, Styles. Now could be the point at which the match picks up in intensity. And good thing, too. I just heard from the back that some of the fans in attendance were leaving early. I wish I could leave early, too.”

Joey: “Trust me, you’re not the only one. Both King and Blaster crawling to their respective corners now…and we could be about to see a preview of Edge Of Survival here, folks. If the Game and Sean both get tagged in here, we could see a preview of what’s to come at Edge Of Survival!”

‘Flec: “Or better yet, maybe they’ll both knock each other out tonight, so we won’t have to sit through it and suffer at the Pay Per View.”

Joey: “You’re hopeless. And King tagging in Sean…and Blaster tagging in the Game, who comes in barreling straight towards Sean, who slides out of the way to avoid making contact with the Game…and the Canucks coming over now…Arcee and Bombers from one side, Blitzwing and Auros from the other…”

‘Flec: “NO FAIR! FOUR ON ONE GANG UP HERE! AND THESE GUYS AREN’T EVEN IN THE MATCH, FOR CHRIST SAKES!”

Joey: “Sean desperately trying to avoid the Canucks here…but Blitzwing and Arcee grab his arms…and toss him back into the ring! And now the Game coming over…picking up Sean...and shouting some very choice words now. The look on Sean’s face is priceless…”

‘Flec: “But wait! Here comes King! With the great equalizer!”
Joey: “What’s he up to? King with a chair now…heading towards the Canucks…and taking out Auros with a shot to the head! King takes out Bombshell with the chair as well…Blitzwing and Arcee trying to stop him now…and both get caught by the King…and the PPC! PPC to both Blitzwing and Arcee on the floor!”

‘Flec: “What’s he doing?! The action’s going on in the ring, not outside it! What are you doing, King?! Sean’s about to get blasted by the Game here!”

Joey: “Maybe not. Here comes the King now…on the inside…He still has the chair…coming up from behind…the Game doesn’t seem to know he’s here…and armed…King swings…and the Game turns around, bringing Sean with him! King tries to stop…but it’s too late! The chair connects to Sean’s skull!”

‘Flec: “WATCH WHERE YOU’RE AIMING, KING!”

Joey: “And now King staring into the Game’s eyes…the Game chuckling…King tries to hit the Game with the chair…but the Game kicks the chair into King’s face...King falls to the mat! And now the Game, standing amidst a sea of carnage…”

‘Flec: “Bodies on the outside…bodies on the inside…I swear, I haven’t seen a wreck like this since the last time that someone broke into the Game’s secret stash. I swear, we’re still cleaning up the mess.”

Joey: “And now the Game picking up the King…setting him up for the Pedigree…but Sean from behind…PEDIGREE to the King…and now the Game getting up…and the HeartBrend Kick! Sean landing the HeartBrend Kick on the Game! And now everyone’s down!”

‘Flec: “What the hell’s going on now?! The Canucks are down…Sean’s down…King’s down…the Game’s down…”

Joey: “But Blaster isn’t! And running for the ropes…and the Soundsault on King! The cover…and Blaster and the Game manage to pull off the upset!”

‘Flec: “But this is just the beginning, Styles. What’s happened here is merely a preview of what is going to happen come Edge Of Survival.
Joey: “That’s right, ‘Flec. Blaster and King go at it for the AWF title, and Sean O’Con and the Game will settle their differences once and for all. See you next week, everybody!”

Oh where do I start with tonight? Do I start with Bugshell and his near bungeling of my match, no I don't start on such a weak note. Do I go with Amarant once again saying he is better then me in spite of the fact I made him tap. Well he is a better way to start then Bongshell but he is still weak sauce compared to the greatest thing to happen this night. Let us start off with the 1...2...3 on Thing. See King there is nothing you can do to keep me from my title. Like the Calgary Flames I am burning up the competition (Insert cheap pop here!) before me and when it comes to you I've got extra reason to kick your ass. Not only do I get the title but I get revenge for 20 days of my life spent in a hospital getting surgery on my knee.

Like I said, don't get too attached to that title because it has been groomed to be around my waist to make me the LOOK OUT AND SHOUT! 3 TIME! YOUNGEST AWF CHAMPION! Amarant can run his mouth about how great he is but he's never played with the big boys, Bombshell and his dog can try and screw my matches up but he'll never be more then a monkey lover, and King, you are about to get a taste of what it is like to face The God Among Men! The Golden one! THE BEST DAMN THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO THE AWF! And you also taste defeat when I put that belt around my waist again!

Skywarp.....

*starts smirking*

Skywarp

*Starts grinning*

Skywarp!

*Starts Laughing*

I told you would lose didn't I? I told you your up agianst the chosen one for the Norse Godsdidn't I? I told you I would win, plain and simple 1...2...3 didn't I?

And now look whats happened my drunk friend. You have lost. Because of the foolishness of attacking your teammate, you my friend have lost! This day shall be remembered the the day Skywarp fell from power! A Day which has been great for me!

You all better listen up, I will get you in time, oh yes I will. I will destroy you like I destroyed Skywarp with Odin's Spear. It never misses a Target. You all will suffer the loss of your Honor!

Skywarp, you my friend, are a loser. You can't do anything about that. So drink some beer in pain for your loss while I have a feast with my Family and my friends. So long, patheic warrior!

D-Ex: You know what..I feel so sorry for myself for getting my anger the best of me. So Sky I am going to apolo...NAH! D-T-A! SKYWARP! D-T-A! So till we meet again, and this time I'm hoping its a singles match between you and me, your gonna feel my rage! Oh and if you were still wondering who drank all your Morphweisers back at the locker room before the match, look no further *points to himself*...damn why the hell do you drink LITE kid?! Your making me look like someone above 21 with your drinking habits man! OO-K! O-K! onto some other matters then!

Oh and as JHA said...Cyberstrike returning..WHO CARES?! he's Extreme?! What does that make me MORE than Xtreme then? BAH!!! Hey Cyberbuddy once you return..expect a return back to the hospital once I run over your crippled ass!!!

OOC: great mayhem! I loved that Auntie Slag thing with Amarant....poor Auntie S

Originally posted by Extreme_Kup
D-Ex: You know what..I feel so sorry for myself for getting my anger the best of me. So Sky I am going to apolo...NAH! D-T-A! SKYWARP! D-T-A! So till we meet again, and this time I'm hoping its a singles match between you and me, your gonna feel my rage! Oh and if you were still wondering who drank all your Morphweisers back at the locker room before the match, look no further *points to himself*...damn why the hell do you drink LITE kid?! Your making me look like someone above 21 with your drinking habits man! OO-K! O-K! onto some other matters then!

Oh and as JHA said...Cyberstrike returning..WHO CARES?! he's Extreme?! What does that make me MORE than Xtreme then? BAH!!! Hey Cyberbuddy once you return..expect a return back to the hospital once I run over your crippled ass!!!

OOC: great mayhem! I loved that Auntie Slag thing with Amarant....poor Auntie S

IC: How about next week if you can find yourself another Tag-Team parnter the nTo will cripple you!

You see Human Bull****? You see what happens when you tangle with the Double S? I get even. Well, I start to anyway. Your piddly little match doesn't even begin to compare with the shot I missed out on for the title when you screwed me over. In fact, none of your matches could ever compare to mine for the simple reason that you suck. So consider tonight the very first step in payback.

You Want Some?
You Got Some!

You Want More?
You'll Get More!

The Game is backstage as Lisa Lovelace and the AWF cameracrew approach him.

Lisa: Nice match out there Game...thoughts?

Game: Thoughts? One thought...Sean...take notes...

The Game tosses his towel on the camera and grabs his bag, walking out.

IC: There you go again Blaster, running your mouth and yapping about one measly victory but the fact is I still have the belt and I am still the best there is in AWF. You want to take the belt from me? Then why don't you shut your a-hole and just try? Cuz you will find out that talk is cheap and your words and $1 will buy you a burger at McD's. So bring it, boy, and let a real wrestler teaches you the true meaning of being a champion.


OOC: Great Mayhem. Looking forward to the PPV.

TC rolls back into the ring, OP2005 walks over and stamps hard on his back. OP2005 lifts TC to his feet, he sets about TC throwing punches all over, head shots and body shots. OP2005 whips RVD into the corner opposite the ladder, over quickly with hard shoulder charges.

OOC: RVD! RVD! RVD!

IC:

OP: Well RV... I mean TC. That was a... *taps head with blod pouring out* bloody match to say the least. But rest assured, this monster cannot be healed of so easily and we will have our revenge!

Originally posted by Cyberstrike nTo
IC: How about next week if you can find yourself another Tag-Team parnter the nTo will cripple you!

D-Ex: Well how about this..SHUT UP CYBERSCRIPPLE! Cause you aint supposed to open your wide ass mouth for 2 more weeks. Or are you too stupid to understand that?! You want a piece of me buddy boy?! Well maybe next time after Edge Of Survival...sure a tag match it is. So its gonna be you and your cane asscream agianst me and a partner? ......wait wait wait...is this a trick question dawg?! I mean sure I know everybody here in the AWF would LOVE to kick your asses as much as I do and beat you guys in less than a minute. But why the hell do you need me to face you in a tag match?

How bout this Cybercripple..you and me...you and me on the next mayhem? That is unless someone from the backstage has the balls to claim like I did that I can hand your nTo asses over in less than a sec! *looks at the backstage area* hey guys...who wants to kick some nTo ass with me..say 'aye'

Originally posted by -Predaking-
IC: There you go again Blaster, running your mouth and yapping about one measly victory but the fact is I still have the belt and I am still the best there is in AWF. You want to take the belt from me? Then why don't you shut your a-hole and just try? Cuz you will find out that talk is cheap and your words and $1 will buy you a burger at McD's. So bring it, boy, and let a real wrestler teaches you the true meaning of being a champion.

You a true champion? You're a belt warmer. You're just making sure the metal isn't chilly for when I wrap it around my waist after making you tap and cry. I'll break you King and not the same type of break I gave you for sucking in the Foundation.

IC: ARGHHHHHH

Damn you Sixswitch ... you messed it all up. i'm gonna bust a cap in your f**kin' @ss, you no good RVD wannabe!

You stepped into my Business and know your gonna pay for it.

*Takes off all the chains*

I'm gonna to hurt you, I'm going to run you down, I'm going to make your life a LVING ... HELL!!

Odd thing about that little event there, it took three of you to take me down. The deck was stacked in your favour and STILL I walked out that ring.

Cloud, let's get one damn thing straight right from the get-go. You are nothing, and you're certaintly not my damn friend so get that idea right outta your tiny little head now. You're right, StoneCold is gonna go drink a few beers, sit and think about what happened, then StoneCold's gonna come out to the ring and whup your ass from corner to corner, all around the backstage, out to the parking lot, through the traffic, back into the arena, through the crowds, into the ring and Stunner your sorry little ass into submission. Then I'm gonna do it all again, for fun.

D-EX : That's damn right son, DTA -- DON'T TRUST ANYONE. I expected you to turn your back on StoneCold, I expected you to take the opportunity with the pack to try and make a name for yourself, hell I consider it a privilage. Matter of fact is, that you've now made my list, I wouldn't worry too much I've still got a lot I need to take care of.

Top of my list? Gruff, Edge of Survival. He's gonna get the ass-kicking of a lifetime. Then I'm gonna get me some beer and whup the life outta Cloudstrifer there...D-EX, you'd imagine you'd come third right? And hell some, give yourself a pat on the back, you're right!! And somewhere along the line, StoneCold's gonna march down the ring and take the AWF Championship, hell I figure it's been more than long enough since the toughest SOB in the AWF held what belongs to him...

Messed it up? I... Messed it up. Haha! Don't make me laugh bitchboy. The Double S doesn't DO messing up. The Double S does what he likes, when he likes, and the Double S just embarassed you again. Why don't you go run to your pimp daddy Viewfind and cry about it? Squirt a little tears? Let off a little steam, y'know?

It might have escaped your attention, Human Bull****, but you've been stepping into my business since Meltdown, and lets not get confused here. The only worry I have about your 'business' is when you soil your pants, and leave it in the corridor for me to step in. Y'see, you seem to be forgetting that the Welsh Wonder's business is far, far more important than anything you might see fit to remove from your ass.

So how about this for a proposition Dozey? How about I come shove your head so far up your ass that you get to see your business first hand?

You want to run your mouth with the Double S? You want to step into the ring with the Welsh Wonder? You want some? Come get some!

Originally posted by StoneCold Skywarp


Top of my list? Gruff, Edge of Survival. He's gonna get the ass-kicking of a lifetime.

StoneCold's gonna march down the ring and take the AWF Championship, hell I figure it's been more than long enough since the toughest SOB in the AWF held what belongs to him...

IC

well we can all tell he's been drinking cant we, while i've been preparing myself for the Rumble he's been sat at the bar drowning his sorrows and thinking of how great he was a long time ago and wondering where his career has gone!

Forget it Skywarp, at Edge Of Survival the future is going to arrive full steam and eliminate you from the Rumble and eliminate whats left of your career!

D-Ex: A privilage? To make a name for myself Sky? To make a name for myself for tagging with you only to obviously get a stunner in the end Sky? I DONT THINK SO! You think I'm the same Dumbs*** I was 2 years ago dude? Think again, its people like you who take a leaf off Cyberstrike's 'tell a tall tale' book that make my stomach sick! So SHUT IT YA DRUNK F***!

As for your list, ooh I'm so scared dude. Why I will pat my back and point at you as I laugh at the sight of you outside the ring after I throw your ass outta it at the Rumble! And as Gruff said, at EOS the future is comin....your future however..will be going down the drain like your 16th can of beer.

Well, Skywarp you can blaber about it all you want, I beat you and I have learnt that you are a weakling. Humph you a legend? Your nothing of the sort. You my friend, are a walking bag of trash which should be thrown out as soon as possible. If none of these losers can do it, then by Odin I will!

You can blabber about how you will beat me, but the fact is that your living in the fantasy world, a fantasy world which I shall kick your ass out of, and pin you agian for the 123! I did it once and I shall do it agian! You want me? You shall get it! I shall meet you head on and I shall win!

THE THREE.

Three little punks from the awf are thee,
Weak as school-girls they well can be,
Filled to the brim with the urge to flee,
Three little punks from the awf!

You all talk big, but you're not. You're nothing but the inconsequential bacteria from inside the ass of the dog who's **** I just avoided stepping in...

You three are the lowest of the low, you're three young upstart punks who are gonna all get taught a lesson in 'how best to receive an asskicking from StoneCold Skywarp' 101, though cloud I know that may be a little advanced for you...

D-EX : Only thing I have in common with Cyberstrike is that I took that 'title' of his and put it with the rest of his promotion -- straight in the trash.

Originally posted by StoneCold Skywarp
THE THREE.

Three little punks from the awf are thee,
Weak as school-girls they well can be,
Filled to the brim with the urge to flee,
Three little punks from the awf!

You all talk big, but you're not. You're nothing but the inconsequential bacteria from inside the ass of the dog who's **** I just avoided stepping in...

You three are the lowest of the low, you're three young upstart punks who are gonna all get taught a lesson in 'how best to receive an asskicking from StoneCold Skywarp' 101, though cloud I know that may be a little advanced for you...

D-EX : Only thing I have in common with Cyberstrike is that I took that 'title' of his and put it with the rest of his promotion -- straight in the trash.

IC: You best make 4 because that are after your old crippled ass
Skyfart.
I don't forget and I sure as hell don't forgive and after me and Cane destroy D-Extreme then I'm coming after you and if I tear the AWF down to get your old drunk ass out of this business once and for all belive I will!
I've beaten legends, icons, hell I beat a god once all you are to me Skydrunk is a piece of **** that I will scrape off my boot on the road to fulfilling my desitny as
AWF
World
Champion.


And by the way Sky you NEVER did win the X-WCW World Heavyweight title from me or any other X-WCW superstar and we both know it and that you sure as hell didn't kill the
X-WCW!

Strike, are you still bitching about the world title?

Don't you remember what I said? Incase you don't I will say it again. You will not get your hands on that title before I do and since I don't have any real interest in it right now you are going to be waiting along time. So do us all a favor and find something else to go for because we all know you are not going to get what you want.

Oh and PS. X-WCW is damn near dead and has been for awhile now.