Madison Square Garden...
A home for legendary events...
A legacy...and a tradition...of sports entertainment excellence...
I Hate Everything about You by 3 Days Grace takes over…
Tonight…scores will be settled…wars will be waged…and one man will get the shot to become the next legend by going to Archivemania to gain a shot at the AWF World Title…tonight the hopes and dreams of every AWF Superstar teeter on the Edge of Survival!
A.O: I feel damn good about it. Ever since I got here, I've always talked about how much I wanted to challenge myself and establish a name for myself here in the AWF. And tonight is going to my biggest challenge yet. As you said, all I have to is beat a slut who doesn't deserve the title that she holds, a man who doesn't deserve to be in the same ring as me and throw out 29 other AWF Superstars. But you know what I say to all of that??
It's just another day for the Rabid Wolverine. *pats his T.V. Title*
Couchman: As you can see, I've learned from watching tapes of Lovelace the proper method of interviewing such a fine upstanding pillar of the community such as yourself. I can understand how you're in high spirits tonight, but I must ask about your battle plan for the rumble. You don't have any friends from the old Mayhem roster. In fact, you've been outright hostile to Blaster. You bad mouthed team Warzone, WAIT! Don't get me wrong.. they, um, deserved it. yeah, that's it. Mind letting go of my tie, please? Thank you so much. whew. With those things in mind, how do you plan on coming out on top during the rumble?
A.O: I plan on going into that ring, making 29 other men tap out and then throwing them over the top rope. The entire AWF roster is going to find out what happens when you piss off the Best Damn Technical Wrestler in this business today.
Couchman: People have been asking, why did you feel the need to show up during Scout's title defense match against nmathew?
A.O: Because they didn't get the point at Meltdown. I beat the living hell out of Scout and then afterwards, Mat Man tries to take me out in the back and for that I made him tap out. I even got him eliminated in that Mayhem vs. Warzone match, which proved useless anyway. After that, Scout felt that she needed to come back out and blindside me with that pansy kick of hers. I attacked them both to show them why you should never piss me off. Tonight, I'm going to MAKE THEM BOTH TAP and make sure that they don't even make it to the Royal Rumble match.
Couchman: Vewfind and Brave Maxx are going to be going at it in a back lot brawl tonight. From your time on Warzone, you've had plenty of time to see these two go at it. Some of the Mayhem watchers may not be as familiar with this rivalry. What can they expect from this match-up?
A.O: I hope they kill each other tonight. Then it's two less guys for me to take out in the Rumble. I don't care what happens to them as long as they don't get in my way tonight. And if they do?? They'll go over the top like everyone else. Simple as that. Tonight, they'll find out just like the rest of them. They'll going to find out how hard it is to PROVE ME WRONG.
Couchman: Amarant, thank you for your time. Is there anything else you'd like to share before you leave?
A.O: Yeah actually.
*He smiles at the interviewer with an evil grin. As the cameraman starts to back off slowly and Couchman starts to sweat*
I like you. You did a good job tonight and you didn't ask me any stupid questions. They should hire you on full time kid. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some ass to kick.
*And with that, Amarant slaps him hard on the back and walks out with his T.V. Title*
Scout (c) v Amarant Odinson (c) v The Mat Man
‘Flec: “PUPPIES! The puppies are on their way out to the ring!”
Joey: “Amarant and Mat Man are on their way out here, too, ‘Flec.”
‘Flec: “Yeah, but who wants to see them. Especially me.”
The Bon Jovi version of “It’s My Life”, AC/DC’s “Back In Black” and White Zombie’s “More Human Than Human” each play for about a minute and a half, signaling the arrival of the AWF Intercontinental Champion, the AWF Television champion, and the challenger for both of their titles.
Joey: “Anyways, let me explain the rules. First competitor to get a pinfall on any of his or her opponents or cause him or her to submit wins the Television title, while the second competitor to get a pinfall or submission win will get their hands on the Intercontinental title.”
‘Flec: “And Scout doesn’t have to be pinned to lose the IC title?”
Joey: “No, ‘Flec. Scout does not have to be pinned to lose the IC title. Neither does Amarant need to be pinned to lose the TV title.”
‘Flec: “Oh, who cares what happens to Amarant. I’m more worried about the puppies.”
Joey: “And this comes to the surprise of no one, believe me. And now Amarant and Mat Man getting into the ring…but Scout’s coming over here!”
‘Flec: “WHOO HOO! Puppies!”
Joey: “Down, boy. Welcome to the announce table, Scout. Mind if I ask what you’re doing down here when you have a match going on?”
Scout: “Certainly, Joey. Now, I’ve got a title already going into this match, and unlike some people, I’m quite happy holding onto what I have, despite the opportunity to get more. So I figured I’d let these two idiots fight it out over Amarant’s little piece of gold, then get into the ring and show them what it means to be a real champion.”
Joey: “A quite mature explanation, isn’t it, ‘Flec?”
‘Flec: “I think I’m gonna barf.”
Joey: “Be sure to aim for the bucket. And now Amarant and Mat Man getting started now…Mat Man taking the early advantage with a series of right hands…backing Amarant into a corner…Amarant with a boot…and a bionic elbow…Mat Man crumbling…Amarant dragging Mat Man away…and a cover…easy kick out.”
Scout: “Amarant’s going to have to do better than this if he hopes to go up against me.”
‘Flec: “I don’t think the fans want to have that image in their minds, Scout.”
Scout: “I meant in the ring, you pervert.”
‘Flec: “My point still stands.”
Joey: “And Amarant taking Mat Man by the hair…dragging Mat Man to his feet…a quick whip into the ropes…Mat Man ducking the clothesline attempt…and now taking to the air…knocking Amarant off his feet…and a cover…and almost three!”
Scout: “Now that’s the kind of competitor I’d like to see. I’m sure that me and Mat Man would make a very interesting couple.”
‘Flec: “Please, Scout! Our audience doesn’t need to hear this!”
Joey: “I’m pretty sure that she meant in relation to a one on one match, ‘Flec. And now Mat bringing Amarant to his feet…kick to the gut…hooking the arm under the head…and a suplex attempt…blocked by Amarant…another attempt…another block…can the third time’s the charm….Mat Man sending Amarant down…another pin attempt…kick out at two.”
‘Flec: “Man. Something’s gotta happen to make this match more interesting. Something that the fans definitely want to see. Something to get our ratings up again.”
Scout: “I’m not taking off my shirt.”
‘Flec: “Damnit.”
Joey: “And Amarant shoving Mat Man away…following up with a clothesline…Mat ducking out of the way…grabbing Amarant from behind…GERMAN SUPLEX! Mat holding on…and another German suplex! Amarant struggling to get free…and a third German suplex! Pinning combination…and a kickout at the last second! God, that was close!”
‘Flec: “Tell me about it, Styles. I came very close to actually caring about this match.”
Scout: “And why do I get the feeling that you’ll only start to care once I’ve gotten involved in it?”
‘Flec: “Am I really that predictable?”
Scout & Joey: “Yes.”
Joey: “Amarant getting a bit frustrated now…”
‘Flec: “The last time I looked like that was when I was on the crapper…”
Scout: “I don’t think the fans wanna hear THAT story, ‘Flec.”
Joey: “Taking Mat Man over to the ropes now…looking to perform the House of Pain…Amarant’s climbing the top rope now…looking to get the House of Pain locked in…but Mat Man shoves him off…Amarant tries to regain his composure…and the Death’s Kiss! Mat Man with the Death’s Kiss! Cover…and we got a new TV champ!”
Scout: “Guess this means that I’d better get to work.”
Joey: “And Scout heading for the ring now. You gotta believe that she’s heading into a disadvantage here, ‘Flec. She’s heading into a situation when one champion has just lost his belt, and would be looking to reclaim it, while the other just won a belt, and would be looking forward to adding another piece of gold to his waist.”
‘Flec: “Who cares? All that matters is that we’re about to see the puppies in action!
Joey: “And that’s all you care about, isn’t it?”
‘Flec: “Pretty much.”
Joey: “And both Amarant and Mat Man jumping on Scout as she slides into the ring…both of them slamming their fists into her back. And now they’re both picking her up. I think they’re working together to wear Scout out.”
‘Flec: “Thanks, Admiral Obvious. I’m sure none of the humanoids have managed to figure that out on their own.”
Joey: “And now tossing Scout into the ropes…double clothesline…and a double elbow…Mat Man going for the cover…1...2…and Amarant pulling Mat Man off of Scout and going for the cover himself! 1…2…and Mat Man pulling Amarant off of Scout!”
‘Flec: “Guys! Guys! Don’t fight! There’s plenty of Scout to go around!”
Joey: “And now Amarant and Mat Man exchanging words…seems the two of them are arguing over whose going to get the pinfall….Ref coming over now…Amarant and Mat Man still arguing…and Amarant spitting in Mat Man’s face…and Mat Man throws a punch…and HITS THE REF! MAT MAN HIT THE REF!”
‘Flec: “That’s a blatant DQ right there!”
Joey: “You’re right about that, ‘Flec. And now the ref’s ordering Mat Man out of the ring! Mat Man taking exception to this, arguing with the Amarant…who laughs in his face, taunting him. Mat Man going to gut punch Amarant…only to get intercepted by Scout. Several hard right punches…and an Irish whip…into the ref, who was still talking to Amarant in the corner, who wisely got out of the way in time!”
‘Flec: “Well, at least now we can say that Mat Man did something of worth in this match.”
Joey: “And Scout with a dropkick to Mat Man’s back…sending the new TV champ to the outside…and now going over to check on the ref…but Amarant dragging her away to the opposite corner, going to try to get the House of Pain again…but Scout with the Tornado kick as he reaches the corner! Amarant slams into the corner…and falls flat on his face.”
‘Flec: “A familiar position, I’m sure.”
Joey: “And now Scout drags him to the center of the ring…and a pin…but the ref still knocked out…1…2…3…Scout should have won the match, but the ref’s still knocked out. Scout going over to get the ref back to his feet…and now Amarant sliding to the outside…grabbing the Intercontinental title. What he’s getting at? That’s not his property!”
‘Flec: “Not yet, anyways. Come on, Scout!”
Joey: “And Amarant sliding back inside of the ring…as Scout gets up…turns around…and ducks the shot! Amarant still has the belt…Scout attempts a superkick…Amarant grabs onto her foot…spins her around…and slams the belt straight into her face!”
‘Flec: “SOMEONE CALL A PLASTIC SURGEON!”
Joey: “And now Amarant with the cover…the ref coming to…making the count…and we have a new Intercontinental Champion!”
‘Flec: “NO! THE PUPPIES! THE PUPPIES! I GOTTA GET UP THERE!”
Joey: “Why?!”
‘Flec: “Scout’s gotta be wrecked after that humiliating defeat. I think that she’s going to need some comfort snuggles.”
Joey: “You’re one sick dude, you know that, right?”
*A promo for Redemption plays*
Cloudstrifer: The wins mean nothing. Sure I defeated The Mat Man, who was more talk than fight, and Skywarp well he's Skywarp. To win over a boastful man with dobious fighting skills and a drunk is no great feat. What is a great feet is me wining this rumble unlike the last time and get that belt on my waist. Its mine, the holders who hold it know its mine and now in front of this match they should bow and give it to me. It is my right to hold that belt, and nothing will stop me. Not 30 men, not 30,000.
Lovelace: You don't have many friends in the AWF. How will this play a factor in your Rumble game plans? Several tag teams will have a chance to work with one another. How do you plan to overcome this obstacle?
Cloudstrifer: Friends? Ha, You must be joking! Friends are a burden when you don't need them the most. Alliances are a better term I would say. Like the alliance of Gruff and myself beating down the old hack of a fighter they call Skywarp. My Plans are simple in the rumble, get in throw everyone out and win. It is a simple plan, but shall be done so effectivly, like Ragnar's raid on Paris, that they won't stand a chance. Tag Teams? Their even more fun to fight with. Imagine yourself fighting 2 unarmed children. Sure its not fun, and sure as hell won't give you a decent fight. The way is simple, eliminate one of them and the other falls down like dust. Tag Teams aren't even worth the dust on my boot.
Lovelace: Are your truly a Viking? I heard some people say your mad and that Odin is all in your mind. How do you respond to this?
Cloudstrifer: Men will say some stupid things won't they to get famous? You see these nay-sayers? These are the tattoo's of the Gods. They shine brightly with a nice blue glow when I am in battle or whenever they want it to. These have been giving to me for a purpose, that is to kick ass and show what true warriors the Vikings are! All you others who say they are notherners are nothing of the sort. You want to prove it to me your Vikings? Then in the ring I shall meet! Odin will have one way or the other!
Auntie: “Darlings hello”!
A little curtsey to show off his new sequined figure-hugging dress (in all the right places chaps)! and a wave of a daintily quiffuered, yet very meaty hand. Manicured, naturally!
Auntie: “Yes I was actually trying to watch 1992’s Sneakers (starring Robert Redford, Dan Ackroyd and Sydney Poitier), but my runner just informed me the show must go on, and go on it shall”.
*Polite coughing from the audience, a tumbleweed rolls by*.
Auntie: “Its PPV night here at the wonderful Madison Square. They’re always happy to have the AWF juggernaut steam into their town, such a boom for local business both legitimately and otherwise. So, that means its time for something, or even someone... a little bit special. Unfortunately we couldn’t afford Carrot Top, so please put your hands together for British Columbia’s favourite bastard son of Avril Lavigne and Rick Moranis, its B-B-B-B- Blaster”!!!!!
As usual, the in-house band put their own clever spin to tonight’s guest music: ‘One of a kind’. Blaster waltzes in (sans Canucks), and sits himself down on the couch, completely unafraid of everything and anything there ever was or ever will be...amen.
Auntie: “Blaster Blaster Blaster, welcome to my Monasterio”.
Blaster: “Don’t start”.
Auntie: “Indeed. Blaster, Blaster P. Mothercanucker you are the worlds youngest everything! At the age of seven, ladies and gentlemen, this young stud became AWF champion. No one knows how he did it, but he did. History tapes, history DVD’s, history books and history adaptations to accompany the tapes and books for the under 10’s all show it. Blaster you have held the Championship belt an unprecedented 27 times and in doing so generated enough AWF merchandising to fuel Bush’s mars plan from planet Cybertron to planet Earth, and back again...”
Blaster: *sighs*
Auntie: “"Blaster, so many AWF Championship belts under your... er.. belt! I've got to ask you, which one was the hardest fought? And did each successive win capture the same magic as the first"?
Blaster: “You know what I don't care what anyone says, the first time always feels the best. You've reached the top and you know you can make it again. The second time just proves you can make it. But my second title win was very special because I fought my way through 4 different people to get it”.
Auntie: "Who is your favorite Canuck, Celine Dion notwithstanding"?
Blaster: “Celine Dion sucks. I'd say my favorite Canuck besides myself has to be Markus Naslund”.
Auntie: "Amarant Odinson.. he's a complete bitch isn't he"?
Blaster: “He is not just a bitch he is a littler bitch. He has a fetish with being proven wrong. He's a lot like Ben Stein only Ben Stein wins every now and then”.
Auntie: "And yet he keeps thinking he's harder than you despite all the smack downs! Tell me, you must have met so many in your illustrious career that constantly give you lip and can't deliver the goods. Do you have any choice expletives you'd like to tell them right now? Go ahead, its PPV, I'm pretty sure you can swear on a pay channel".
Blaster: “Oh I've met too many wannabes in my career. They all talk tough but get their asses kicked when it gets rough. People like Redstreak, Viewfind, Amarant, Bombshell, Sir Auros, Prowl?, King, all these people suck harder then Richard Simmons on a visit to the Village People trailer but seem to think they are best of the best. Then I face them... beat them... and take their titles”.
Auntie: "I must say I was shocked when I saw your match against King and O' Con in Calgary. The King amassed a series of patented power moves on you, then decimated the rest of the Canucks single-handedly. If it weren't for your timely Soundsault in the dying seconds of the match, it would have been an out and out slaughter! My lord but you must be aching to bust the King seventeen ways from six Sundays from now, or then... I forget. What have you got brewing"?
Blaster: “Oh King Decimated the Canucks. Jesus look who it is! Bombshell, Auros and Blitzwing. I've met children who can take a beating better then those three assclowns. I swear I was drugged when I picked them for my team. As for King let’s just say I have a little plan that will hospitalize him for a month and let me run with the title”.
Auntie: "No Blaster interview can possibly be complete without two words... Monkey Butler! How much fun was it having Bomber's tend to your every sordid whim"?
Blaster: “Oh it was great. I got everything I needed from that dumbass. Watching him warm up to the Monkey and eventually start a relationship with her. *Mock cries* It was great. It's good to see he and the Monkey are still going strong though the fact he changed her name from ChiChi to Arcee saddens me”.
Auntie: "Some long time fans might recall how a couple of years ago you went through a slightly disturbing patch involving playing with knives and being a little strange. Is that behind you now? I'm just wondering if we can expect another Ghost/pills/headache thing in the future".
Blaster: “Again I was drugged. I think Cyberstrike and D-Ex slipped something into one of my drinks when they were stalking me. Sick freaks those two are. It'll never happen again... unless those two slip weird stuff in my drinks again”.
Auntie: "In the spirit of tonight's festivities, what has been your most memorable PPV"?
Blaster: “Most memorable PPV? I'd have to say that is a tie between the first Archive-Mania where I put TC through the top of the cage, or Meltdown two years ago when I beat TC for the title”.
Auntie: "Who do you think has the best chance of winning the Rumble"?
Blaster: “It won't matter because I will beat who ever it is”.
Auntie: "Do you have an opinion of the new talent gracing the AWF? The Gruff and Xille for instance, do they have the right stuff"?
Blaster: “Well I brought Gruff into this fed but I still am the future. Being so young they are just late bloomers. I think those two can make it though some people just might not”.
Auntie: “Well Blaster it’s been a pleasure having you on my seat. Ladies and gentlemen (and I can legitimately call you that because you’ve actually paid for your seats tonight), can we have a big hand for the former, and possibly soon to be again AWF Champion. Yes, he hates Celine Dion and he hates many a wrestler, why he even hates his own team!!! But then, people are strange, when you’re a stranger, faces look ugly, when you’re alone. Ooooh Keifer Sutherland! Oh dear I’ve come over all queer! That’s it from me, I’m off backstage to get completely legless and snog a hapless cameraman or two. Music maestro if you please”.
Light jazz of Sepultura’s ‘Refuse, Resist’ plays for no apparent reason other than the in-house band are really getting into their stride. The studio lights come down as Auntie lights a cigarette and daintily strides offstage.
JFA: Lets get backstage to Jon Couchman again who is with Wolfang!
Couch: Wolfang, tonight you are going to enter the ring and face off against 29 different opponents. One of them is your fellow tag champion, Black Zarak. Do the two of you have any special plans designed should both of you be in the ring at the same time?
Wolfang: To answer that, Z and I are both aware that there's a good chance of both of us being in there at the same time. If such is the case, we'll help each other. If it comes down to me and him, we'll do what we've had some experience at doing and beat the sh*t out of each other. In short, there aren't any genuinely 'special arrangements'; we both want a shot at the AWF Title.
Couch: Very well. Everyone knows that you're a tough competitor, but you are going to face former AWF champions such as Viewfind, Stone Cold Skywarp, and you could be facing off against other tag teams that would love to soften you up. You have to admit that you have your work cut out for yourself. Care to share your thoughts on your chances at emerging as the AWF's number one contender?
Wolfang: Well, I'm not the fastest. I'm not the strongest, I'm not the most beloved, and I'm certainly not the prettiest competitor in this thing. I am, however, one of the toughest. I know there are people who are going to be gunning fo me personally as well as gunning for Blood & Thunder. I say bring it on. The odds may not be in my favour, but I'll enjoy beating the odds as much as I'll enjoy wasting anyone else. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to remind everybody to say their prayers before I join the battle....
*Elsewhere Lisa Lovelace is with the new TV Champion, the Mat Man*
Lisa: We're backstage with the new TV Champion: The Mat Man himself, nmathew! nmat, thanks for taking the time to speak with us.
nmathew: My pleasure. Lets get started, shall we?
AWF Jobber Interviewer: How do you feel about your first match tonight?
nmathew: I think the fans know how I feel. Amarant still has a belt, and besides that, well. It's history and I need to concentrate on the rumble.
Lisa: Always the professional. Very well, how does a technically based wrestler such as yourself prepare to face off against 29 other superstars in what can only be called a melee?
nmathew: You're joking right? The Mat Man defended the hardcore title for 4 months. You prepare by being tough and smart.
Lisa: What exactly do you mean by smart?
nmathew: Look. Remember how I tagged with Quick Switch for over a year. We won a few titles together? Yeah, that guy. We get along. God Jinrai, we've patched things up. Sixswitch, we were on team Mayhem. The Game was also a member of said victorious team. Do you honestly believe these people who claim they're going to eliminate 29 other men? Please. You need someone in there who will watch your back, or you'll be outside wondering what happened.
Lisa: So, you're saying that you have some hard alliances?
nmathew: Heck no! I just have fewer enemies, and a few people I believe would at least look me in the eye before kicking me in the groin.
Amarant Odinson appears from behind a curtain
AO: Don't count on it. Despite your best attempts, I'm still wearing gold. Furthermore, the last thing I'm going to see of you tonight is your ass as it flies over the top rope.
AO turns and leaves
nmathew turns from the camera and says to himself, "We'll have to see about that Amarant," as he pulls a faded Pulp faction T-shirt from a gym bag.
Bombshell with Arcee v Jinrai
JHA: I'm not sure if I should be excited or terrified.
JFa: I second that. We've seen hell in a cell, war games, a barb wire match but this one has the potential to become the most brutal match we've seen. In order to win this match you have to actually set your opponent on fire. No pinfalls, no submissions, no disqualifications. Nothing, but fire.
JHA: In my estimation, God Jinrai has a major disadvantage.
JFA: How so?
JHA: Well, since he's been waging war on Bombshell and the Canucks, he's been playing with fire for the last couple of months. He's bound to catch it tonight.
JFA: You are just... Wait a minute. Even though that was completetly biased it was somewhat clever. You're really making a progress.
JHA: Why you...
Before the commentators can really begin bantering Powerman 5000's Drop the Bombshell starts to play and Bombshell enters the arena with his girlfriend Arcee following him.
JFA: The crowd is all over Bombshell but he seems to be ignoring it. Arcee's with him but I doubt she'll be playing any major role in this one. The ring will be surrounded by fire so she probably won't be able to interfere.
JHA: You're saying it like otherwise she'd interfere. That's slander!
JFA: Yes, it's not like she's made it a habit.
JHA: Exactly!
Bombshell enters the ring with Arcee and starts taunting the crowd. He's cut short though, as "Hold Your Head Up" by Stan Bush starts, signaling for the entrance of God Jinrai. The crowd's jeers quickly turn to massive wall of cheers as God Jinrai steps slowly towards the ring.
JFA: Jinrai is not in a hurry, he knows he'll soon get Bombshell all to himself. And it seems Bombshell wouldn't have it any other way.
JHA: Of course not. It was bombshell who wanted the inferno match. He's not afraid of Jinrai.
God Jinrai enters the ring looking at Bombshell who's already waiting for him. As Jinrai steps over the ropes Arcee leaves the ring and the match is ready to begin. The officials around the ring ignite the fire and quickly it surrounds the ring. God Jinrai and Bombshell both take a minute to watch the fire surrounding them, knowing that there would be no way out.
JFA: Timekeeper rings the bell and this match is underway. Bombshell and God Jinrai immediately go at it. Right hands from both men and neither of them is backing down. In the end, Bombshell gains the upper hand and forces Jinrai back. Jinrai backing to the corner and Bombshell still swinging those punches. Jinrai grabs a hold on Bombshell's throat and throws him in the corner. Now Jinrai with a right hand, and kick to the midsection. Jinrai whips Bombshell to the opposite corner and follows for a clothesline. Bombshell still in the game though and Jinrai ran right to Bombshell's boot. Jinrai is staggering and Bombshell's quickly on it, grabs Jinrai's arm, twists it and delivers an elbow right on the arm. Jinrai drops to his knees but Bombshell still has the hold on his arm. Bombshell forces Jinrai up and drops him with a close range clothesline.
JHA: What did I tell you? Bombshell has Jinrai's number and he'll make short work out of that loser.
JFA: Don't sell Jinrai short. He maybe down but he's definitely not out.
Bombshell picks Jinrai up and whips him to the ropes and goes for a clothesline. Jinrai ducks it and returning from the ropes hits Bombshell with a shoulder block. Bombshell falls to the ground but gets quickly up just to receive a shot to the back of the head. Jinrai drags Bombshell to the ropes and starts heaving him over the ropes, trying to drop Bombshell on the flames. Bombshell grabs the ropes trying to stay inside and counters with an elbow to the midsection, forcing Jinrai back a few steps.
Bombshell tries to whip Jinrai to the ropes but Jinrai counters and sends Bombshell to the ropes instead. When Bombshell comes back he hits a flapjack from the center of the ring sending Bombshell dangerously near to the ropes. Bombshell lies in the ground for a moment but as soon as he feels the heat near his head he backs down trying to avoid the flames.
JFA: Bombshell almost got on fire but with a quick reaction avoids the contact. Those flames are dangerously close and that may be the deciding factor in this one. You don't necessarily have to dominate the match. Just a little error, a minor misstep and you're on fire.
JHA: Yeah, that's the only way Jinrai might win this match. Otherwise he's got no chance.
JFA: For a man with no chance he's looking mighty strong right now. Jinrai delivering a couple of stern kicks to Bombshell's body before picking him up. Jinrai whips Bombshell to the corner and a HUGE clothesline and the big man is down. Jinrai wipes some sweat from his forehead.
JHA: I've been doing that all the time. Look at me, I'm sweating like a pig.
JFA: Resist the urge, resist the urge.
JHA: I knew I should've brought my handkerchiefs with me. It's hot as hell in here.
JFA: He's right folks. It's really hot here and I can only imagine how hot it must be in the ring, with fire surrounding them. Jinrai now, picking Bombshell up but Bombshell counters with a kick and follows with a right hand. Jinrai is staggering and Bombshell grabs a hold and connects with suplex. Bombshell mounts the opponent and hits with a punch after punch.
Finally after a moment Bombshell gets up and picks Jinrai. He throws Jinrai to the corner and starts pushing him towards the fire. Jinrai tries to grab the rope and keep himself away from the flames while Bombshell uses all his strength to get Jinrai on fire. After a while Bombshell gets frustrated and kicks Jinrai on the stomach and picks him up. A stiff right hand drops Jinrai down and Bombshell drops an elbow to inflict more pain.
JFA: Jinrai is down and Bombshell is once again pushing him towards the fire.
JHA: Go for it! Set him on fire!
JFA: Jinrai's trying to resist but Bombshell is pushing him closer and closer.
JHA: Tell me, how do you like you're God Jinrai? Medium or well done?
JFA: You're just a box full of laughs. Jinrai gets free with a rake to the eyes and he's out of the fire for a moment. Bombshell is still staggering and Jinrai hits a scoop slam. Jinrai picks Bombshell right back up, whips him to the ropes and hits a powerslam. Bombshell is down and Jinrai is backing towards the corner.
JHA: Oh no, oh no!
JFA: He's waiting for Bombshell to get back up, he might be going for the spear.
JHA: Don't get up, Bombshell! Stay down!
JFA: Arcee is screaming the same instructions to Bombshell but Bombshell is almost up. Jinrai is looking ready and he...
JHA: Ha!
JFA: Bombshell ducked but Jinrai stopped right before hitting the corner post! He turns around and Bombshell hits a big boot.
JHA: Bombshell has Jinrai scouted. He ducked the spear, he can counter every move Jinrai makes.
JFA: That's left to be seen. Bombshell drops the elbow on Jinrai's face, and another! Jinrai rolls around in pain and Bombshell continues the onslaught.
Bombshell connects with a couple of stiff kicks to Jinrai's head while Jinrai is getting up. Bombshell tries to whip Jinrai to the corner but Jinrai counters and sends Bombshell face first to the corner and hits a sidewalk slam on the staggering Bombshell. While Bombshell tries to get back up Jinrai raises his hand and signals for the Firestorm, his own version of the chokeslam. Bombshell gets slowly up and when he does he meets God Jinrai's right hand on his throat. Almost panicking, Bombshell reacts and kicks Jinrai in to the midsection forcing Jinrai to release the hold. Bombshell tries to whip Jinrai to the ropes but Jinrai again counters, sends Bombshell to the ropes and hits a spinebuster. Immediately Jinrai picks Bombshell on his shoulders and throws him to the corner connecting with a snake eyes. Jinrai waits patiently for Bombshell to stagger back to him and grabs a hold on his hips trying to turn him around and hit a piledriver. But because of the sweat he can't get a good hold and Bombshell lands on his feet behind Jinrai.
JFA: Bombshell now, a kick to the midsection... oh my!
JHA: Jacknife! Bombshell hits a Jacknife! It's over!
JFA: In a normal match I would have to agree with you, but this is an inferno match and Jinrai is in the center of the ring! Bombshell needs to drag him to the fire if he intends to win with that one.
For a moment Bombshell is too tired to capitalize but soon he grabs Jinrai by the legs and starts pulling him closer to the fire. He manages to get Jinrai near the ropes before Jinrai wakes up and starts to struggle. Bombshell decides to end Jinrai's struggle with an elbow drop but Jinrai rolls out of the way and Bombshell lands on the mat. Slowly both men get on their feet but Bombshell is a bit faster. He scores with a right hand and tries to send Jinrai to the ropes. Jinrai counters but when Bombshell comes back Jinrai is too blatant with a back body drop attempt and Bombshell connects with a DDT.
JFA: Bombshell in control now. He picks Jinrai up, a stiff kick and a right hand send Jinrai back. Bombshell whips Jinrai to the ropes, Jinrai ducks the clothesline, coming back... a SPEAR!! Jinrai hits the spear!
JHA: Bombshell is down, and Jinrai's going for another?
JFA: It would seem so. He's kneeling to the ropes, still careful to not touch the flames and is eagerly waiting for Bombshell to get up.
JHA: Two spears in a row? He's trying to break Bombshell in half.
JFA: Bombshell slowly back up, Jinrai advances... Bombshell sidesteps and sends Jinrai over the ropes!!
JHA: He's burning! He's burning!
JFA: No, his velocity send him straight over, he didn't even touch the fire!
While Jinrai is trying to get up from the drop Bombshell drops to his knees in exhaust, trying to catch his breath. It takes a moment before both men are back up, Bombshell inside the ring, Jinrai in the outside. Both competitors look at each other, before Jinrai spots something in the corner of his eye. A small figure shouting something at Bombshell. Arcee. With a grin Jinrai turns his gaze towards Arcee, and to Bombshell's shock starts advancing towards the woman.
JHA: What is he doing? He is going to attack a woman!? Disgraceful!
JFA: Bombshell and Arcee have been nothing but trouble for Jinrai for the past couple of months and now he has a chance for a little payback. And I doubt he cares much about grace!
JHA: But he wouldn't hit a woman, would he?
JFA: He hasn't been above it in the past, and I don't think this hell-like atmosphere is helping.
JHA: Bombshell, do something!
JFA: Bombshell is like a trapped animal. He wants to help his girlfriend but he's stuck inside the ring. And all the while Jinrai is stalking Arcee.
JHA: Someone stop this! Arcee, get away!
JFA: Arcee tries to run away but Jinrai gets a hold of her hair and pulls her back. Normally I'd consider violence against women highly condemnable but Arcee had this coming!
JHA: You're a damn hypocrite, you know that?
JFA: Jinrai seems to be going for a powerbomb on Arcee. But meanwhile Bombshell runs to the ropes, gains some momentum and JUMPS OVER THE TOP ROPE! Oh my god! He knocks not only Jinrai but also Arcee down!
JHA: I've no doubt that whatever Jinrai had in mind would've been worse.
JFA: Now both men on the outside. They are no longer surrounded by the fire but now they are outside the ring with all the possible weapons at hand. And this is still a no disqualification. I believe this has gone from bad to worse.
Bombshell picks Jinrai up and after a couple of right hands he throws Jinrai against the stairs. Not wasting a moment Bombshell delivers a kick before picking Jinrai up from the head and dropping him with a stiff right hand.
JFA: Jinrai is down and Bombshell seems to be looking for something. What can he possibly... oh my!
JHA: A steel chair! That should take Jinrai down! Go, Bomby, go!
JFA: Jinrai gets slowly back up but Bombshell is waiting. And he drops Jinrai back down with a chair shot! Right between the eyes! Damn that Bombshell! Jinrai's been busted open!
Jinrai falls down and Bombshell starts to taunt the crowd again. After a while he drops the chair and picks Jinrai up. But before he can do anything Jinrai gathers all the strength he has and pushes Bombshell against the guard railing back first. Both men struggle to get on their feet but Jinrai is a bit faster. A kick to the midsection bends Bombshell over and gives Jinrai the opportunity to grab his hips and hoist him to the air.
JFA: A sit-down powerbomb outside the ring! Bombshell is down and he's gotta be out!
JHA: But Jinrai isn't going for the kill. The flames are still burning, he has to get Bombshell to it if he wants to win this.
JFA: Good point. What is Jinrai doing? He grabs the steel stairs which he was thrown into a couple of minutes ago. Bombshell is getting up... and Jinrai levels him with the stairs!
JHA: What a brutal, uncaring monster! What's he doing now? He places the stairs above Bombshell's head. He isn't going to...
JFA: Jinrai climbs on the guard railing. No, no!
JHA: NO!
JFA: Elbow drop from the railing on the stairs! Bombshell's nose must be broken!
JHA: It wasn't pure cookies for Jinrai either! He's holding his elbow, he must've injured it with that elbow drop!
JFA: Slowly Jinrai gets up and picks Bombshell up too. Now we can see... Yes. Bombshell is bleeding! His nose looks like a Mini after a crash and his forehead is full of cuts! Both men are bleeding extensively and I don't see them calling quits anytime soon!
JHA: If this was a submission match we'd be here tomorrow. But as you mentioned, only a minor mistake is needed and you lose. And now that their outside, it's even easier to do a fatal mistake and lose the match.
JFA: Jinrai goes for the powerbomb, if he succeeds he'll be a step closer to winning this match. He tries to pick Bombshell up.. but he's too exhausted! Bombshell counters... and a back body drop! Jinrai lands on his back! And let me tell you folks, that's not a thick matress on top of the cement floor. Jinrai withering in pain and Bombshell's not looking much better.
JHA: Here, take mine.
JFA: What are you doing?
JHA: Arcee needed a place to sit so I gave him my chair.
JFA: The match isn't over! Arcee doesn't need a place to sit.
JHA: Maybe she's tired. And I understand a redneck like you would turn a lady down but I'm a gentleman.
JFA: If she's tired why is she giving the chair to Bombshell?
JHA: A caring girlfriend! She sees Bombshell is in agony and decided to give him a chair to rest on!
JFA: Bombshell takes the chair... and smacks Jinrai with it! Right in the head! What do you say now, H?
JHA: All out of ideas, sorry.
JFA: Jinrai doesn't even know where he is but still he tries to get up! Chair shot to the back! Jinrai is down! And another on the leg! Bombshell is picking Jinrai apart!
JHA: I admit, Jinrai is tough, but even he can't overcome this!
Bombshell throws the chair away and picks the prone body of God Jinrai up and hoists him up on his soldiers, trying to hit another Jacknife. Somehow Jinrai struggles himself free and lands behind Bombshell. Quickly Jinrai turns around and pushes Bombshell straight against the guard railing. Bombshell's face hits the railing and the big Canadian drops like the US dollar. Jinrai raises slowly to his feet. The crowd erupts as he raises his hand and waits for Bombshell to get up. Like in slow motion, Bombshell slowly gets on his feet and turns around, only to get his throat grabbed by God Jinrai. With great effort Jinrai hoists Bombshell up and smacks him down with a chokeslam.
JFA: Firestorm chokeslam by Jinrai! Bombshell is out! Jinrai is going to win this!
JHA: Don't count your chickens before the escape plan is complete! He still has to get him near the fire!
JFA: Jinrai picks Bombshell up and goes for the throat again. Another chokeslam?!
JHA: This is too much! Let the man rest!
JFA: Jinrai lifts Bombshell up and moves towards the ring. He's going to slam Bombshell on the flames! He's going to win this!
JHA: They're right next to the ring! Bombshell is going to lose! Wait, look at Arcee... I mean, look somewhere else!
JFA: Low blow! Low blow by Arcee!
JHA: Jinrai always needed a woman's touch.
After Arcee hit Jinrai below the belt Jinrai dropped Bombshell and doubled over. Bombshell landed on Jinrai's feet which gave him an opportunity to trip Jinrai over. He grabs Jinrai by the waist and pulls Jinrai over him towards the ring.
JFA: Jinrai falls on the apron! His sleeve catches fire! Jinrai is on fire! Bombshell has won this one!
JHA: Told you so.
JFA: Jinrai is rolling on the floor, trying to smother the fire as Arcee helps a VERY wounded Bombshell on his feet.
JHA: Look, Arcee has some cleansing fluid with him. He can clean Bombshell's wounds right here.
JFA: I don't think that's cleansing fluid... Arcee throws some of it on Jinrai and the fire spreads all over! That's definitely not cleansing fluid!
JHA: Now I remember, Arcee used that to fill a lighter backstage.
JFA: That's gasoline! Arcee's spraying gasoline on Jinrai! Someone get a damn extinguishor here! Jinrai's on fire and that Jezebiel is throwing gasoline at him!
Like on cue a couple of AWF officials run to the ringside with a fire extinguishor and put down the fire on God Jinrai.
JFA: Thank god Jinrai is safe! And it doesn't look like he suffered any major damage from the fire.
JHA: Forget about God Jinrai. Bombshell is the winner!
JFA: Indeed he is, but he doesn't look like it. Barely walking, he's moving towards the backstage with Arcee's help. God Jinrai was set on fire but I bet he won't be alone in the hospital tonight!