Sir Auros' review of: Optimus PrimeName
: Optimus PrimeAllegiance
: Autobot LeaderSub-Group
: NA"Freedom is the right of all sentient beings!" Optimus Prime is the bravest, strongest, and wisest of all Autobots. His role is to protect all life in the fight to defeat the Decepticons. This all-powerful leader features a cab section that converts into his battle-ready robot mode, while his back trailer section becomes a high-tech command station complete with two launchers and an arsenal of mega-missiles. His combination of intelligence and strength makes him a respected commander, and a feared warrior.
Everybody does stupid stuff when they're drunk. It's some sort of drunken reflex. A stupid habit of mine is going online while inebriated and I'll quite often either:A
- Abuse people on the messageboards here.B
- Make my way to ebay and make bids I regret later.
I'll also sometimes put up the most disgusting pornography I can find as a wallpaper, but that only applies if I'm using someone else's computer at the time. Anyway, this all brings us to Machine Wars Optimus Prime. I think I honestly believed the figure was rare and desirable at the time I placed my winning (and admittedly fairly low) bid. Machine Wars was a really short-lived line that came out in 1997 during Beast Wars and was exclusive to KB Toystores. I never saw any in stores and had never seen one in person till I received this goofy incarnation of the Autobot's leader. Like many of the Machine Wars figures, Prime's actually a repaint of a European only G2 figure. In the Europe of 1992, they called him Thunder Clash and he was bright pink and turquoise. Finally, him being a repaint of a G2 figure coupled with our not having a Machine Wars section is why I'm padding the G2 section with this review. This is not
a drunken mistake. [ It just looks like one now. =P —Denyer
Ugh, this freakin' kills me. The arms are so unarticulated it's depressing. They can move a little at the elbows and have to stay by Prime's sides like he has a BO problem that he thinks he can hide if he can keep his pits closed. The head is also very un-Primely, but looks like it could've suited an Ultra Magnus figure. Mine didn't have his gun, so I don't know how well the figure holds it, but I can't imagine it's very well. Mine's also lacking the kinda spiffy sticker on the chest. The legs are woefully immobile like the arms, but unlike the arms, they don't have articulation in the least and have that ever-annoying, G1-esque trait of being stuck together. The robot mode's pretty much poop on a stick, but forum member Pun-3x once posted his tips for decrapifying it. Think it involved unscrewing something in the arms and cutting the plastic holding the legs together. Try searching in our Toys forum; I'm sure it's in there.Robot Mode
Remember when I mentioned that Prime's head looked like it would work for Ultra Magnus? If not, then it's time to up the Ritalin and read that last paragraph again. The vehicle mode, while not a car transport, also seems very fitting for an Ultra Magnus figure. I really actually like the vehicle mode and it's one of the two reasons I haven't thrown the figure in my box of crap I'm putting up on ebay next time I'm drinking. The rocket launcher thingies on top look cool and the truck's cab looks pretty decent too. The detailing isn't what it could be, but I'd imagine it'd look quite spiffy with a nicer paintjob. I'd buy this figure if it were repainted for the Universe line because of the vehicle mode, maybe named Ultra Magnus or something.Base Mode
I know it was standard for Primes to have base modes somewhere in their alt forms, but this is just sad. Maybe it's because I don't have all the stickers, but this is one pathetic looking thing. It's hard to get it symmetrical, it doesn't resemble so much a base as some sort of really awkward tower, and it incorporates all of five ugly colors. The picture really says it all.Transformation
: 5 - Not exactly rocket science and could use more articulation.Durability
: 8 - Not too bad, but the elbow joints on mine are really loose. No doubt caused by some kid repeatedly moving the one moveable part of the figure.Fun
: 6 - Robot and base modes are lousy, but the vehicle mode's worth displaying.Price
: 7 - I got mine for $20 incomplete, but even that felt like far too much.Summary
: 6 - There are better Primes and better figures from Machine Wars. Don't screw around on ebay while you're sloshed.