The name your own Disfigurative Transformer Disease thread

Zisteau · Post by **Zisteau** » Wed Jul 20, 2005 7:32 am

You heard it. I have four for you and then you can run with the concept.

The Monkey-legs Syndrome: Sufferers of this disease includes Cybertron Crumplezone and Optimus Primal. It has been rumored in medical research circles that it was that damn dirty ape who started spreading the disease in the first place.

The Kangaroo-arm Syndrome: This disease has reached near epidemic status, with vast numbers of Transformers succumbing, including almost all G1 Gestalt Members. Other afflictees include several upstanding members of the Transformers community, such as G1 Hardhead.

The Omega Virus: Named for its most famous aflictee Omega Supreme , this is a form of cancer that specifically targets the hand. The side effects are sometimes beneficial, such as in the cases of Shockwave and BW Neo Longrack. Other times, it results in gross deformations the purpose of which can only be guessed at, such as with Cybertron Thundercracker.

Penguinitis: A very rare disease, the most noteable case involves the G1 triple-changer Broadside. Those who suffer this rare affliction are almost always ridiculed and scorned by their comrades. Such depraved, pathetic souls. Sad, really. *Sniff*

Now have some fun, and come up with your own.

chimung · Post by **chimung** » Wed Jul 20, 2005 12:24 pm

BFH - Big Friggin' Hands Syndrome
Many TFs suffer this horrible conditions, it's a disease that horribly flaws an otherwise perfect toy, Usually effecting just one side, this disease turns one of the suffer's hands into a ridiculously large and Akward looking extremity, a few examples are Beast Wars Megatron, X-Brawn, and even as recent as GF/Cybertron Thundercracker, only you can help stop BFH, by beating the toy designer responsible in the face with a brick, together, we CAN do it.

Wildfire Herald · Post by **Wildfire Herald** » Wed Jul 20, 2005 4:23 pm

Flat Handitis - Disease causes the subjects hands to lock into a flat, open handed slapping configuration, preventing them from wielding weapons properly. Examples include Transquito and Energon Arcee.

Brave Maximus · Post by **Brave Maximus** » Wed Jul 20, 2005 8:52 pm

Orandice - similar to the human condition Jaundice and closely linked to CCB (See below). This tragic condition causes good looking moulds to be defaced by a horrible orange tint. This can be anything from a gross clear\metalic flake akin to urine, to the solid bright orange that has infliced many of the famous transformers for generations. Sufferiees include: G1 Rodimus Prime, BM Blast Punch Optimus Primal, AM Optimus Prime, GF Flame Convoy and Victory's Tackle (who also suffers from CCB).

CCB or Crayola Colour Blindness. This is where a figure suffers from outlandish and quite attrocious colour matching. It appears as if a small child melted their crayola crayons over them, and no one has cleaned them up. Prime examples are: The Generation 2 Figures, E Bruticus, U Jhiaxus, and most of the Transformers Universe line.

Please, help find a cure - petition Hasbro and Takara to employ designers with a sense of taste.

Only you can save a good mould from a bad colour scheme......

Post by **Clay** » Wed Jul 20, 2005 11:50 pm

The Jenga Syndrome.

Victims of this malicious disease require absolute care and tedium, and a certain amount of mojo, when being stored on the shelf, lest they fall over. Causes include: tiny feet; being top heavy; and weak joints.

Famous cases include: BW TM2 Blackarachnia, G1 Superion, Cyberjets, nearly all of the Micromasters and Minicons, BW Iguanus, and G1 Devastator.

Reflector · Post by **Reflector** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:01 am

This is fun.

Aurosteoporosis: A genetic disease affecting the basic skeletal structure of its host. The afflicted segments of the body become incredibly brittle, particularly with age. For those with severe cases, even simple processes such as transformation or raising an arm can be suicidal. Noteable bearers are Skyhammer and G2 Slingshot. Those afflicted can be spotted by the shiny golden hue of the diseased limbs.

Zisteau · Post by **Zisteau** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:19 am

Out of Context Giantism and Dwarfism: The origins of this disease and how or why it spreads are unknown. Those afflicted find their toy to be grossly out of proportion with their fellow transformers' Cartoon or Comic personas. The difference in size in some Transformers between their Cartoon and their Comic personas further complicates accurate diagnosis, but several clear examples exist. The most obvious is the grotesquely bloated Supreme Cheetor. For dwarfism, see: Unicron and G1 Metroplex.

Knightdramon · Post by **Knightdramon** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:30 am

Woobly Syndrome, aka Parkinson [sp?] : Figure has too many parts that have to snap together to create either the robot or the vehicle form. Most of these parts shift positions with the slightest movement, causing joints to unlock, or random parts hanging from the figure. Patients: BT Mustang mould in robot mode, Energon Slugslinger, Superlink Afterburner, BT Imprezza mould in robot mode, RID Ultra Magnus in both modes and finally, the grand and impressive Omega Prime [RID].

Post by **inflatable dalek** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 4:31 pm

The Short Arm Syndrom[/I] This particualy affects the ickle head guy of Energon Omega Supreme. The poor souls arms do not extend far enough to pass what forms Omega's ear/antenna thingeys, meaning he's unable to pick things up of a level surface and is forced to carry a poop scoop everywhere he goes and can never embrace a woman without poking her eyes out.

[Actually, looking at this list a lot of TF's suffer from hand ailments, have they been touching somthing they shouldn't?)

optimusskids · Post by **optimusskids** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:56 pm

Pretenderitis

A horrible disfiguring disease that changes there official alt mode into , drum roll, a circus contorsionist . This leads the suffers to look like a bent up robot some fortunate mechs like bludgeon and Catilla have escaped this disease.

Explosive Accidental Hand Loss

This terrible infliction inflicts mostly autobots. It occurs when the Transformer in the heat of battle accidentally fires there fists at the enemy having forgot to change them for missiles. Inflicts Hoist, Trailbreaker, Grapple, Inferno, Sunstreaker etc

chimung · Post by **chimung** » Thu Jul 21, 2005 11:49 pm

Here's a couple more from me

Wing-Chest
A strange condition causing the victim's chest plate to grow too wide, keeping them from using thier shoulder articulation, most notable victims of this disease are G1 Devestator, as well as Micromaster Gestalts, even Landcross.

Sideswipe Syndrome
Named for Armada Sideswipe, the sufferer is stricking with a grotesque mutation of thier robot form, making them so hideous that they only wish to be seen in thier alternate mode.

Ranma · Post by **Ranma** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 4:27 am

BUDDA BELLY

Infectious eating disorder causes subjects stomach to rapidly increase in girth despite closely monitored energon consumption. worst cases include E-prime, g1 razorclaw, g1 inferno/grapple, g1 Hoist/trailbreaker, and Fortress Maximus.

Post by **inflatable dalek** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 12:02 pm

Brickitus Afecting Fort Max, PM Prime and others, this is fairly self explanatory...

Ravage · Post by **Ravage** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 12:25 pm

Also to go with Brickitus, we have LethalWeaponitis.

Transformers so heavy and think they could be used to kill annoying people or small game.

dedicon · Post by **dedicon** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 2:59 pm

Unarmedimusis: For Transformers that come with no weapons, other than stupid built in ones. The Energon deluxe gestalts are a good example, also the brick knowned as Energon Ultra magnus(and his red Armada counterpart,forgot the name) and BM Blackarachnia for example.

Sillynagobsis: Those who come with stupid weapons. Like tail swords/whips, or horns. Few examples are TM Rhinox, BM Cheetor(Mega sized),BM Rattrap and RID Heavyload.

Gimmikus Stirrrosiss syndrome: The "weapons in exchange for gimmicks" effect. AKA the entire Armada line exepct some very few toys.

chiasaur11 · Post by **chiasaur11** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 4:40 pm

Skitzoheadia

The sufferer has 2 or more heads built in, causing othert bots to laugh and often hampering head articulation. Sufferers include dinobot and cheetor. Fortunatly modern surgical techniques can cure some sufferers, and almost no new cases hve been reported in the last 2 or 3 years.

RUNAMOK · Post by **RUNAMOK** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 4:55 pm

skin eczema

this desease infects the "skin" on some parts of the body, and causes that small parts of the skin falls of, in other words, paint chipping

Brave Maximus · Post by **Brave Maximus** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 7:11 pm

Originally posted by chiasaur11
Skitzoheadia

The sufferer has 2 or more heads built in, causing othert bots to laugh and often hampering head articulation. Sufferers include dinobot and cheetor. Fortunatly modern surgical techniques can cure some sufferers, and almost no new cases hve been reported in the last 2 or 3 years.

Unfortunatly, new cases abound, though they are harder to spot at times. New sufferers include Armada Overload, Energon Ultra Magnus and Sentinal Maximus. Energon's Omega Supreme and Sentinel both suffer this problem and of course, Armada Sideways with three possible heads (all of which are ugly).

A slight diriviative of this deseased is Vehicular Cranium - this is where the subjects alternate mode has a clear and unabashed head. Sufferers include all the vehicles from Beast Wars and Energon Ironhide, as well as RID X-Brawn.

This is not to be confused with Vehicular Partial Crania-obscura. This desease causes the transformers robot head to be partially visible with no hint of hiding the what is visible. Sufferers inclued The Armada Seekers, GF Starscream, First Aid and Nitro Convoy.

Zisteau · Post by **Zisteau** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 9:08 pm

Purple is Evil Skin Fungus

The strange alien skin fungus only known to affect the most morally corrupt. Notable cases include Shockwave, Galvatron, Trypticon, and Skorpinok.

Post by **Clay** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 11:51 pm

Reversirriosis OR the Evil Twin Syndrome: Victims of this affliction have been repainted to different faction than they were originally. Patients include:

BW Tigerhawk/Universe Razorclaw
Big Convoy/Nemesis Prime
Deluxe Armada Prime/Nemesis Prime
Tripredacus/Tripledacus
BW Dinobot/BWNeo Hardhead
G2 Optimus/RID Scourge

And of course, most of the Alternator/Binaltech lines...